tired.. i need a break ..
haiz.. 2dae got sd cic mtg.. n i attended though i not a cic in sd.. hmmm.. quite tired 2dae.. shld sae quite tired tis past few daes.. as my work r piling up.. n was super busi wif my gakkai activities oso.. jus finished wif my ssa district family dae.. n guess wat.. we hit e target we set.. yeah.. super happi.. n thankie 4 all e leaders who came 2 support mi.. after e mtg itself on 20th which is last sundae.. went 2 soka rites.. in other words went 2 attend a funeral wake.. it's a WD mber in my district.. she jus passed away at e age of 90.. wow.. old rite?? actuall my mood was badly tat da.. i onli noe of e news on e sundae mornin itself.. n.. on e other hand, i mus make sure i'm happily facing my new frenz in e ssa family dae in e afternoon.. haiz.. tis is e 1st funeral wake i attended as e status of a leader.. realli upset..
now.. my concentration is on e musical byakuren mbers supposed 2 put up durin our sept byakuren mtg in sept.. onli left wif abt 2 weeks b4 e actual performance.. n then at e same time.. yr end soka kindergarten alumni concert oso goin in2 e preparation period le.. oh no.. will b super busi.. actuall was sick 4 abt 2 weeks le.. i veri stubborn.. noe i sore throat badly yet it took mi 1 wk later 2 then consult e doc.. by then, i alread lost my voice.. jus managed 2 recover my voice onli..but still havin flu n sore throat..
though i'm sick, i still continue 2 attend my gakkai activities as per normal.. till mondae, was pretti bad.. mayb i shld sae is gd fortune ba.. boss ask mi go hm rest n gave mi half dae leave.. n tuesdae itself, i was on mc.. went 2 consult doc e 2nd time.. actuall i shld b still on medication de.. i didnt take actuall.. cos takin e medi makes mi drowzy.. so i insist not 2 take.. tat's y i arent recovering fast.. e road of kosen-rufu has no resting.. so i mus jiayou.. n then my work.. quite a lot.. cos my director on mc cos he terribly sick..
2dae attended e sd cic mtg.. actuall i not cic lahz.. but attended it wif xueyun.. was hopin 2 c him.. but once again.. i dropped 2 world of hell.. *misery* .. haiz.. it's okie.. every sat n sun.. one dae at least mus chiong 3 sessions.. hopin from mtg 2 another mtg 2 concert events 2 homevisit.. veri tired ar.. i need a break badly.. jus hope i can slp 1 wk dun wakey.. lolx.. tink i'll b paralysis after tat.. lolx..
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Sunday, August 13, 2006
i'm working on others' happiness n let mine b found eventually
[i'm working on others' happiness n let mine be found eventually]
tis few daes been veri busi.. every dae is chiong-ing 4 my work.. my work is piling up.. n it jus gets taller n taller on my desk.. jus like fridae.. i got planning mtg at 8pm at bukit batok.. guess wat.. i onli managed 2 leave my work place at paya lebar at 7pm.. oh no.. luckily tat dae my admin manager cum sales personel goin hm early.. if not, i tink i 8pm oso dun need 2 go back.. haiz.. jus like yester.. i planned 2 work till 2pm n chiong 2 tbsc 4 e sd nationwide mtg de.. but office pple goin back early.. i left my work place ard 1.15plus ba.. oh no.. got lotsa work haven finish yet.. die lahz tis time round.. mondae sure got lotsa stuff 2 finish..
was pretti fun yester during e mtg actuall.. got lotsa sd seniors shared their testimony.. got mani cic n iic graduated oso.. got sum newly appointed ones oso.. was quite happi 4 them oso.. though i dun realli hav any institue.. but attending nrpsd de wif xueyun.. but xueyun has 2 leave early.. sobx.. luckily still lay leng ard.. was hopin 2 c him.. till e end of e mtg.. i tot it will b a disappointing dae 2 mi.. wanna sae gd bye 2 yvonne, caifeng n soo shan they all.. then when i turn round facing e exit door of e main hall.. i catch a glimpse of a person's back who realli look like him.. end up they sae take grp photos.. once again.. tat person disappear in front of mi.. after e photo taking, i left tbsc wif soo shan.. at e lobby area.. saw one of my close sista.. i dun realli feel e close-ness wif her anymore..
tat's wat how mi after she was attached.. tat's wat i hate 2 c oso.. i noe having a bf 2 mani gers is e most impt thingy in life.. but dun u need frenz n close frenz ard too?? last time.. when i was deeply in life in my sec sch life.. i oso tink e same way.. tink back.. i realli feel tat tat's a veri stupid way of thinking.. oops.. shld sae foolish.. i'm realli naive last time.. love is not everythingy.. jus like i once quote from sensei's guidance : " love is not 2 pple gazing at each other but 2 pple lookin ahead in e same direction ".. i can live out a bf's love.. but i noe there's lotsa frenz loving n caring 4 mi.. tat's enough le..
at e bus stop outside shell petrol kisok.. i saw him.. was quite happi actuall.. n my bus came.. i boarded e bus.. yet he didnt notice mi.. so sad.. n didnt hav e courage 2 call him oso.. was even more upset when i saw him not realli happi n feelin a bit down.. heartbroken.. but i'm praying 4 his absolute happiness everydae.. " You must be happy worz.. I'm praying earnestly for you.. "
thankie for waking mi up 2 my senses.. after seeing u yester.. i realised tat i should not be hopin 2 find my happiness so selflessly.. buy workin hard on others' happiness n let mine be found eventually.. jus like when we practice.. we mus practice 4 oneself n 4 others..
took a small test on chinese fortune thingy de.. n tat's how i'm being described..
[ Your life is represented by the garden full of rich soil with a devoted spirit, so you like to help people without asking for anything in return. You keep your word and you like kind and determined people. You look like an easy-going person but you are actually quite determined. It's hard to tell what's on your mind and you tend to keep a low profile.]
jus feel tat it's realli describe mi well.. i help pple n wont ask anythingy in return.. i do keep my words.. hahaz.. n as 4 relationship.. tat's wat they sae abt mi..
[ In your relationship, you are mutually loving and respectful of each other. Your love is full of romance and happiness. In romance, according to our analysis, you are easily attracted to someone you admire in your heart, but you often end up empty-handed because you are too shy to go after him. Generally speaking, men do not have deep first impression of you, so they need time to discover your inner beauty. You, however, tend to like a person at the first sight, but not after a period of time. Therefore, if you are still waiting for a good romance, try to show your inner beauty by doing more activities, establishing better habits, and socializing with more people. This way you can express your inner beauty naturally all the time, which makes your romance go more smoothly. In the journey of life, your romantic or marriage partner might be introduced by relatives and friends, or through matchmaking. You tend to be inexperienced in love, unable to express yourself, and do not know how to actively pursue someone without being too sticky or giving up easily. You have opportunities but are afraid to get hurt, so eventually it is not easy for you to have the spark of love. If you are still seeking your love partner don't rush because someone nearby likes you, so as long as you sincerely give a little hint, the happiness is right beside you.]
i'm tat kinda of timid person 2wards love.. n tat's true.. n i alwaz believe in 1st sight love a lot.. mayb bcos of my horoscope - sagittarius ba.. hahaz.. n i'm alwaz afraid 2 get hurt.. and n as 4 wealth.. they sae i noe how 2 make money but not gd in saving.. yup.. tat's true.. i not stingy type of person.. i'll spend wat i hav 2 spend even when i finacially tight.. lolx.. 1st one mus improve.. so i'm savin money now.. kekez..
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask from u..
tis few daes been veri busi.. every dae is chiong-ing 4 my work.. my work is piling up.. n it jus gets taller n taller on my desk.. jus like fridae.. i got planning mtg at 8pm at bukit batok.. guess wat.. i onli managed 2 leave my work place at paya lebar at 7pm.. oh no.. luckily tat dae my admin manager cum sales personel goin hm early.. if not, i tink i 8pm oso dun need 2 go back.. haiz.. jus like yester.. i planned 2 work till 2pm n chiong 2 tbsc 4 e sd nationwide mtg de.. but office pple goin back early.. i left my work place ard 1.15plus ba.. oh no.. got lotsa work haven finish yet.. die lahz tis time round.. mondae sure got lotsa stuff 2 finish..
was pretti fun yester during e mtg actuall.. got lotsa sd seniors shared their testimony.. got mani cic n iic graduated oso.. got sum newly appointed ones oso.. was quite happi 4 them oso.. though i dun realli hav any institue.. but attending nrpsd de wif xueyun.. but xueyun has 2 leave early.. sobx.. luckily still lay leng ard.. was hopin 2 c him.. till e end of e mtg.. i tot it will b a disappointing dae 2 mi.. wanna sae gd bye 2 yvonne, caifeng n soo shan they all.. then when i turn round facing e exit door of e main hall.. i catch a glimpse of a person's back who realli look like him.. end up they sae take grp photos.. once again.. tat person disappear in front of mi.. after e photo taking, i left tbsc wif soo shan.. at e lobby area.. saw one of my close sista.. i dun realli feel e close-ness wif her anymore..
tat's wat how mi after she was attached.. tat's wat i hate 2 c oso.. i noe having a bf 2 mani gers is e most impt thingy in life.. but dun u need frenz n close frenz ard too?? last time.. when i was deeply in life in my sec sch life.. i oso tink e same way.. tink back.. i realli feel tat tat's a veri stupid way of thinking.. oops.. shld sae foolish.. i'm realli naive last time.. love is not everythingy.. jus like i once quote from sensei's guidance : " love is not 2 pple gazing at each other but 2 pple lookin ahead in e same direction ".. i can live out a bf's love.. but i noe there's lotsa frenz loving n caring 4 mi.. tat's enough le..
at e bus stop outside shell petrol kisok.. i saw him.. was quite happi actuall.. n my bus came.. i boarded e bus.. yet he didnt notice mi.. so sad.. n didnt hav e courage 2 call him oso.. was even more upset when i saw him not realli happi n feelin a bit down.. heartbroken.. but i'm praying 4 his absolute happiness everydae.. " You must be happy worz.. I'm praying earnestly for you.. "
thankie for waking mi up 2 my senses.. after seeing u yester.. i realised tat i should not be hopin 2 find my happiness so selflessly.. buy workin hard on others' happiness n let mine be found eventually.. jus like when we practice.. we mus practice 4 oneself n 4 others..
took a small test on chinese fortune thingy de.. n tat's how i'm being described..
[ Your life is represented by the garden full of rich soil with a devoted spirit, so you like to help people without asking for anything in return. You keep your word and you like kind and determined people. You look like an easy-going person but you are actually quite determined. It's hard to tell what's on your mind and you tend to keep a low profile.]
jus feel tat it's realli describe mi well.. i help pple n wont ask anythingy in return.. i do keep my words.. hahaz.. n as 4 relationship.. tat's wat they sae abt mi..
[ In your relationship, you are mutually loving and respectful of each other. Your love is full of romance and happiness. In romance, according to our analysis, you are easily attracted to someone you admire in your heart, but you often end up empty-handed because you are too shy to go after him. Generally speaking, men do not have deep first impression of you, so they need time to discover your inner beauty. You, however, tend to like a person at the first sight, but not after a period of time. Therefore, if you are still waiting for a good romance, try to show your inner beauty by doing more activities, establishing better habits, and socializing with more people. This way you can express your inner beauty naturally all the time, which makes your romance go more smoothly. In the journey of life, your romantic or marriage partner might be introduced by relatives and friends, or through matchmaking. You tend to be inexperienced in love, unable to express yourself, and do not know how to actively pursue someone without being too sticky or giving up easily. You have opportunities but are afraid to get hurt, so eventually it is not easy for you to have the spark of love. If you are still seeking your love partner don't rush because someone nearby likes you, so as long as you sincerely give a little hint, the happiness is right beside you.]
i'm tat kinda of timid person 2wards love.. n tat's true.. n i alwaz believe in 1st sight love a lot.. mayb bcos of my horoscope - sagittarius ba.. hahaz.. n i'm alwaz afraid 2 get hurt.. and n as 4 wealth.. they sae i noe how 2 make money but not gd in saving.. yup.. tat's true.. i not stingy type of person.. i'll spend wat i hav 2 spend even when i finacially tight.. lolx.. 1st one mus improve.. so i'm savin money now.. kekez..
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask from u..
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
勇敢的幸福
勇敢的幸福
yester.. was a bad dae 4 mi.. i was havin a bad flu n gastric pain.. yet i was forced 2 work till 8plus.. customer last min fax their sketch of e cutters they wanna order over.. so i was forced by my sales personel 2 stay back 2 draw.. then they oso sae wan straight fluting or spiral de.. end up.. from e customer's sketch, i feel is straight fluting de, so i draw straight de.. end up.. finished liao e sales personel sae is spiral fluting de.. i'm like so tired le lohz.. cant i b granted a break??
but hearin lotsa bad feed back abt mi from my senior.. pple tink tat i'm e one who stole 2 ricebowl of my senior, n make boss transfer him 2 another department.. i dunoe any inner news oso.. i'm innocent.. yet.. pple love 2 back stab n gossip behind my back.. it's okie.. i can endure all these.. but i jus wanna cry out when i ever tot of tat.. mani a times, it isnt my falut, but i'm alwaz e one who get all those stupid scoldings n 2 bear all e mistakes n responsiblity i dun hav 2..
mayb i'm young ba.. nian qing jiu shi ben qian.. pple envy.. no choice.. but i'm tired.. how i wish i can fulfill my dream of goin back 2 school.. i wanna fulfill my ambition.. i alwaz believe in tryin.. cos i noe if i try, there's a glimpse of chance of succeedin.. so i try.. try 2 make engineering design as my ambition.. i try 2 make tis my dream.. i need tat courage.. 2 b xin fu..
i alwaz tink u r e one i can turn 2.. is u who came in2 my mind when i almost burst out in2 tears yester while workin.. is u who makes mi hold back my tears.. 2 at least struggle on wif a glimpse of courage tat i hav.. but whenever i feel like calling u or sms-ing u.. my hands trembled wif fear.. i'm jus afraid of rejection from u.. i noe.. wo xin zi du ming tat i'll nv b e one who comes across ur mind be it when u r upset or filled wif joy.. i noe.. u dun hav 2 explain.. but.. i jus cant stop tinking of u.. i jus cant tellin myself not 2 love u or care 4 u.. u're e one who pick mi up when i fall badly.. u're e one who opens e door 2 happiness 4 mi.. if not of u, i'll nv b able e door of happiness is open 4 u.. plz brin mi along.. plz wait 4 mi at e finishing line.. dun worry.. though i'm far behind.. i'll catch up wif u................................
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask from u..
yester.. was a bad dae 4 mi.. i was havin a bad flu n gastric pain.. yet i was forced 2 work till 8plus.. customer last min fax their sketch of e cutters they wanna order over.. so i was forced by my sales personel 2 stay back 2 draw.. then they oso sae wan straight fluting or spiral de.. end up.. from e customer's sketch, i feel is straight fluting de, so i draw straight de.. end up.. finished liao e sales personel sae is spiral fluting de.. i'm like so tired le lohz.. cant i b granted a break??
but hearin lotsa bad feed back abt mi from my senior.. pple tink tat i'm e one who stole 2 ricebowl of my senior, n make boss transfer him 2 another department.. i dunoe any inner news oso.. i'm innocent.. yet.. pple love 2 back stab n gossip behind my back.. it's okie.. i can endure all these.. but i jus wanna cry out when i ever tot of tat.. mani a times, it isnt my falut, but i'm alwaz e one who get all those stupid scoldings n 2 bear all e mistakes n responsiblity i dun hav 2..
mayb i'm young ba.. nian qing jiu shi ben qian.. pple envy.. no choice.. but i'm tired.. how i wish i can fulfill my dream of goin back 2 school.. i wanna fulfill my ambition.. i alwaz believe in tryin.. cos i noe if i try, there's a glimpse of chance of succeedin.. so i try.. try 2 make engineering design as my ambition.. i try 2 make tis my dream.. i need tat courage.. 2 b xin fu..
i alwaz tink u r e one i can turn 2.. is u who came in2 my mind when i almost burst out in2 tears yester while workin.. is u who makes mi hold back my tears.. 2 at least struggle on wif a glimpse of courage tat i hav.. but whenever i feel like calling u or sms-ing u.. my hands trembled wif fear.. i'm jus afraid of rejection from u.. i noe.. wo xin zi du ming tat i'll nv b e one who comes across ur mind be it when u r upset or filled wif joy.. i noe.. u dun hav 2 explain.. but.. i jus cant stop tinking of u.. i jus cant tellin myself not 2 love u or care 4 u.. u're e one who pick mi up when i fall badly.. u're e one who opens e door 2 happiness 4 mi.. if not of u, i'll nv b able e door of happiness is open 4 u.. plz brin mi along.. plz wait 4 mi at e finishing line.. dun worry.. though i'm far behind.. i'll catch up wif u................................
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask from u..
Monday, August 07, 2006
[[ my heart is bleeding - guess i NEVER be e one in ur heart]]
[[ my heart is bleeding - guess i NEVER be e one in ur heart]]
My heart bleeds when i tot of u.. mom sae sumthingy 2 mi tat dae.. she sae " bei ai shi xin fu de".. but i simply dun agree.. if e person who loves u deeply yet u dun hav any special feeling 2wards tis person, then u will b equally nan shou.. n i alwaz faced in such a situation.. e person who loves mi wang wang is not e person i love.. e person whom i love deeply simply dun ever bother 2 look at mi.. ai shi bu shi hen tong ku nen??
i start 2 feel tat pple ard mi arent appreciating my efforts.. i done so much.. yet.. i tink they dun feel grateful but presurrized ba.. pin wen.. guess u r realli my lucky star, my best listener.. he is my soka ex school mate.. he is as old as mi.. so lucky of mi though we arent from e same class, we'll able 2 meet one another after we graduated 13yrs from soka kinder.. bcos of his words, he realli makes mi feel tat i'm a person pple can give great respect 2..but cannot alwaz ba zhan u later she complain.. kekez..
realli veri stressful tis few weeks, my slp everydae gets lesser n lesser.. n i'm alwaz woken up by nightmares.. sumtimes.. i'm jus terrified.. n my religion stuff.. in aug.. i actuall did my 1st byakuren duty on a super impt event.. n tat's e ltg.. n i'm in charge 2 help out in e award presentation.. while i was holdin on 2 e cetificate 4 GD Ong give out.. he smiles at mi.. heart simple melted.. seems like how tough n busi tat dae can b.. everthingy is enlightened.. n one of e in charge, melvin.. mani gakkai pple shld noe him ba.. he's e chorographer 4 yr 2001 youth ndp.. actuall got tok 2 him b4 last time.. but guess he cannot rmb..he oso thankie mi 4 my efforts.. sobx.. almost gan dong till drop teard..
jus bein appointed as a district leader on e 4th of aug.. busi preparing my ssa family dae discussion meetin as well as workin on hard 4 e yr end concert..guess i realli tat chiong type.. every week end is gakkai activities.. on sat.. usuall after work will atend meetin in e afternoon then hop 2 another place 4 another meetin.. jus like last sundae.. after work, i went 2 e plannin 2 at sk.. n hop 2 clementi 4 homevisit.. then sundae oso.. usually i'll attend mornin gongyo session at e kaikan then go 4 another meetin in e afternoon n another in e nitez.. so sorrie xianyun tat i'm pretti busi tis period tat i hav no time 2 shop wif u.. sorrie!!
my work.. is givin mi probz..i jus dunoe how 2 de-stress now.. n those gossipers in my company makes mi feel tat i'm workin meaninglessly.. how i wish dun need 2 work but onli strive 4 kosen rufu.. n i'm tinkin of goin back 2 studies.. jus like all my frenz.. realli envy them studyin in poly 2 accomplish their ambition.. but i'm afraid tis will actuall increase e burden of my finanical needs at hm.. i dun mind suffering jus 2 let my younger bro complete his education n gets in a gd uni..
of cos.. xueyun.. u oso done a great part encouragin mi.. u 2 will alwaz be one listening 2 my grumble, sharin my sorrows n happiness.. if not 4 u 2.. i'll hav given up durin tis period le.. realli thankie a lot.. down wif a bad flu n hav been continously havin gastric pain 4 e past few days.. mayb i jus too stress up.. but i realli accomplish sumthingy gd yester.. i managed 2 invite 2 of my new frenz 4 e public lecture yester.. guess they realli hav a deeper faith in out religion.. great yeah!!! hor hor hor.. at least tat's sumthingy gd i can share wif now..
as 4 him.. haiz..wat u promise.. u nv do.. i'm realli disappointed when i saw sumthingy on other pple's blog.. i noe.. i'm nv important 2 u.. ya rite.. u r jus a fren.. a pu tong peng you.. wat rights do i hav 2 ba zhan u?? wat rights do i hav 2 obstruct u attaining eternal happiness?? hav been listening veri deeply in S.H.E. "bu zhou ni de peng you".. tat's how i feel.. can i not b ur fren?? can i?? i nv love envyin pple bein so loving n happi.. i nv love tis kinda of feelin.. when will it b my turn?? i do hav lotsa frenz.. i hav been workin hard 4 pple ard mi 2 b happi n 2 attain eternal happiness.. gohonzon.. will mine be comin??
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask 4 from u..
My heart bleeds when i tot of u.. mom sae sumthingy 2 mi tat dae.. she sae " bei ai shi xin fu de".. but i simply dun agree.. if e person who loves u deeply yet u dun hav any special feeling 2wards tis person, then u will b equally nan shou.. n i alwaz faced in such a situation.. e person who loves mi wang wang is not e person i love.. e person whom i love deeply simply dun ever bother 2 look at mi.. ai shi bu shi hen tong ku nen??
i start 2 feel tat pple ard mi arent appreciating my efforts.. i done so much.. yet.. i tink they dun feel grateful but presurrized ba.. pin wen.. guess u r realli my lucky star, my best listener.. he is my soka ex school mate.. he is as old as mi.. so lucky of mi though we arent from e same class, we'll able 2 meet one another after we graduated 13yrs from soka kinder.. bcos of his words, he realli makes mi feel tat i'm a person pple can give great respect 2..but cannot alwaz ba zhan u later she complain.. kekez..
realli veri stressful tis few weeks, my slp everydae gets lesser n lesser.. n i'm alwaz woken up by nightmares.. sumtimes.. i'm jus terrified.. n my religion stuff.. in aug.. i actuall did my 1st byakuren duty on a super impt event.. n tat's e ltg.. n i'm in charge 2 help out in e award presentation.. while i was holdin on 2 e cetificate 4 GD Ong give out.. he smiles at mi.. heart simple melted.. seems like how tough n busi tat dae can b.. everthingy is enlightened.. n one of e in charge, melvin.. mani gakkai pple shld noe him ba.. he's e chorographer 4 yr 2001 youth ndp.. actuall got tok 2 him b4 last time.. but guess he cannot rmb..he oso thankie mi 4 my efforts.. sobx.. almost gan dong till drop teard..
jus bein appointed as a district leader on e 4th of aug.. busi preparing my ssa family dae discussion meetin as well as workin on hard 4 e yr end concert..guess i realli tat chiong type.. every week end is gakkai activities.. on sat.. usuall after work will atend meetin in e afternoon then hop 2 another place 4 another meetin.. jus like last sundae.. after work, i went 2 e plannin 2 at sk.. n hop 2 clementi 4 homevisit.. then sundae oso.. usually i'll attend mornin gongyo session at e kaikan then go 4 another meetin in e afternoon n another in e nitez.. so sorrie xianyun tat i'm pretti busi tis period tat i hav no time 2 shop wif u.. sorrie!!
my work.. is givin mi probz..i jus dunoe how 2 de-stress now.. n those gossipers in my company makes mi feel tat i'm workin meaninglessly.. how i wish dun need 2 work but onli strive 4 kosen rufu.. n i'm tinkin of goin back 2 studies.. jus like all my frenz.. realli envy them studyin in poly 2 accomplish their ambition.. but i'm afraid tis will actuall increase e burden of my finanical needs at hm.. i dun mind suffering jus 2 let my younger bro complete his education n gets in a gd uni..
of cos.. xueyun.. u oso done a great part encouragin mi.. u 2 will alwaz be one listening 2 my grumble, sharin my sorrows n happiness.. if not 4 u 2.. i'll hav given up durin tis period le.. realli thankie a lot.. down wif a bad flu n hav been continously havin gastric pain 4 e past few days.. mayb i jus too stress up.. but i realli accomplish sumthingy gd yester.. i managed 2 invite 2 of my new frenz 4 e public lecture yester.. guess they realli hav a deeper faith in out religion.. great yeah!!! hor hor hor.. at least tat's sumthingy gd i can share wif now..
as 4 him.. haiz..wat u promise.. u nv do.. i'm realli disappointed when i saw sumthingy on other pple's blog.. i noe.. i'm nv important 2 u.. ya rite.. u r jus a fren.. a pu tong peng you.. wat rights do i hav 2 ba zhan u?? wat rights do i hav 2 obstruct u attaining eternal happiness?? hav been listening veri deeply in S.H.E. "bu zhou ni de peng you".. tat's how i feel.. can i not b ur fren?? can i?? i nv love envyin pple bein so loving n happi.. i nv love tis kinda of feelin.. when will it b my turn?? i do hav lotsa frenz.. i hav been workin hard 4 pple ard mi 2 b happi n 2 attain eternal happiness.. gohonzon.. will mine be comin??
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask 4 from u..
Saturday, July 29, 2006
[ a dae of excitement n misery ]
[ a dae of excitement n misery ]
yester.. i took leave 2 rest n 4 a veri impt reason.. n tat's 2 attend e nrpsd graduation at e botanic garden.. it's been super long since i last step foot in2 botanic garden.. now.. e botanic garden veri nice.. after all e renovation.. 2 seniors graduating yester.. they r sharon n elaine.. pretti happi durin e events yester.. but.. as wat xueyun sae.. i mus b veri upset he's not there.. anw.. no worries.. i nv give myself hope tat he's gonna b there actuall lahz.. i noe though he veri active in gakkai activities, he hardly attend sd stuffs.. summore yester is e ndp preview.. so is expected he wun b there lahz.. quite fun yester.. n we were given 5 questions 2 reflect yester..
yester.. i took leave 2 rest n 4 a veri impt reason.. n tat's 2 attend e nrpsd graduation at e botanic garden.. it's been super long since i last step foot in2 botanic garden.. now.. e botanic garden veri nice.. after all e renovation.. 2 seniors graduating yester.. they r sharon n elaine.. pretti happi durin e events yester.. but.. as wat xueyun sae.. i mus b veri upset he's not there.. anw.. no worries.. i nv give myself hope tat he's gonna b there actuall lahz.. i noe though he veri active in gakkai activities, he hardly attend sd stuffs.. summore yester is e ndp preview.. so is expected he wun b there lahz.. quite fun yester.. n we were given 5 questions 2 reflect yester..
=> 7mths has passes, wat's ur greatest achievement?
=> wat's e greatest regrets u hav?
=> wat's ur happiest moments ?
=>wat's ur saddest moments?
=> n e last question, wat's ur goals 2wards e end of yr 2006?
i wrote quite a lot but didnt manage 2 finish all e questions actuall.. tis yr has been a veri challengin yr wif lotsa suprises.. in jan.. i took up basic german language course as i will b goin 2 germany 4 training..n tis started e dispute n unhappiness of my manager 2wards mi.. he kept findin faults wif mi when i didnt even do anythingy wrong..2 him, wat i do is wrong, onli he's rite.. bull-shit!! n struggled thru e 2 n a half mths time 2 cope wif my work n my part time studies.. startin work everydae 2 mi is like goin back 2 hell.. n tat veri moment, i was selected 2 b in e byakuren renaissance course.. in my heart, i noe i gonna face lotsa sansho shima.. anna left my district tis yr oso.. leavin mi wif no ywd district leader 2 take care mi..
then in may.. i moved hse.. moved back 2 our own flat in yishun.. n tis started e dispute of mi n my paternal relatives.. includin my blood-related uncles n aunts, as well as my grandparents.. after one week stayin in yishun, one fine fridae afternoon, boss talked 2 mi wif e presence of my director.. he asked mi if i wan 2 transfer 2 e design department n b a designer.. without even givin a second tot, i agreed.. oh no.. hahaz.. but.. in my new workin environment, everythingy seems 2 b veri gd.. but.. in e hidden part.. is another hell.. mani pple dun recognise my capability.. cos i'm young n e youngest in e whole company.. n they feel tat i'm given favourism from my boss cos he's my dad's best fren.. my dad is oso one of e manager in e company n boss trusted him e most.. but tat's not true.. pple jus love comparin mi wif my dad.. haiz.. so.. sumtimes.. it isnt too gd workin in e same company wif ur own parents or relatives..
workin under my director.. he's quite nice.. but i nv seems 2 learn lotsa thingy from him.. cos in my company, there's a trend.. seniors r afraid tat their status will b replaced.. so cumin 2 teachin juniors.. they teach half then keep half 4 themselves so as 2 protect their ricebowl.. wat e hell rite?? pple wif capability n qualities dun hav 2 worry their ricebowl.. dong jia bu da, da xi jia lohz.. wat 2 worry.. haiz.. i oso faced sum dispute in my district.. n it realli makes mi learn lotsa experiences.. i'll b appointed as district leader tis cumin fri.. those pple who r fang bian should alwaz try 2 give in 2 those not veri fang bian de.. rite?? isnt tat b e way 2 work well wif no politics??
now.. i'm became one of e main commitee in e yr-end-skalumni-concert.. my job is a co-ordinator.. but there seems 2 b no unity in e grp mbers..without unity, there wont b strength and joy.. n sumtimes pple jus dun tink b4 2 sae.. sorrie 2 sae tat.. but we mus b realistic when we works.. n musnt b selfish.. quite disappointed when i heard my frenz sayin tat we should not give in 2 guys so much when i tried 2 persuade them 2 accomodate wif one of e grp mate.. when cumin 2 kosen-rufu spirit, it's no matter of gender.. we shld accomodate wif those who r not so fang bian de.. practicin nichiren daishonin's buddhism as his disciple, we shld noe how 2 practice not onli 4 oneself but 4 others.. if u're so selfish in ur tinkin, then all i can sae tat ur ichinen is wrong n u're on e wrong track of ur life.. i jus hopin tat everyone can work n bearing in mind e spirit of "many in body, one in mind".... tink is gonna b a great challenge 2 fight 4 e unity of all our commitee mbers.. *upset*
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask 4 from u..
Sunday, July 23, 2006
[ gua mu xiang kan.......... ]
gua mu xiang kan....
it's been a super long time since i last blogged ba.. actuall i jus too lazy n too busi ba.. in july.. all a sudden.. i jus got involved in mani mani stuff.. n july was a pretti busi month actuall.. cos.. we celebrate our 55th ywd formation dae.. n so it's e ywd.. yeah~
guess i'll b gettin more busi in august as well ba.. sorrie xianyun.. i noe i neglected ur feelings.. i'm jus tired.. i dun even hav time 4 myself.. sobx(T.T).. jus attended my BTC on e 16th.. was pretti gd.. quite interestin actuall.. n got 2 noe a few gers from byakuren as well.. i hav been in e byakuren 4 more than half yrs time le.. yet.. i dun realli mani pple there.. except e same few old frenz.. but my relation wif e byakuren chief quite gd.. kekez.. tat's suprising yeah??
as a co-ordinator in my soka kinder yr end concert, i was realised tat i got mani thingys 2 do.. haiz.. jus feel super stressed lohz.. haiz.. n.. i'll b appointed as my district's leader in my district in august.. but.. i'll hav alread been involved in e plannin.. 2dae was my discussion meetin.. i performed quite well actuall.. hahaz.. sound i'm like praisin myself.. but was given too little time 2 prepare.. jus had our plannin on mondae.. n had my homevisit on wed.. n went 2 e lders' study meetin on thurs.. n attend my dad's han's discussion meetin.. so realli no time..
actuall wanna slp a bit longer 2dae b4 attendin my discussion meetin at 2pm de.. end up.. was awaken by didi's noise n xueyun's sms.. n rush down 2 tsc 2 c e golden lion's training.. wanna invite them 2 perform durin our alumni yr end concert..
oh no.. i'm sick.. havin bad flu.. n tml.. goin back 2 work again... haiz.. sianz.. i jus wanna go back 2 sch.. n pursue my interest.. haiz.. e dream seems so far..
it's been a super long time since i last blogged ba.. actuall i jus too lazy n too busi ba.. in july.. all a sudden.. i jus got involved in mani mani stuff.. n july was a pretti busi month actuall.. cos.. we celebrate our 55th ywd formation dae.. n so it's e ywd.. yeah~
guess i'll b gettin more busi in august as well ba.. sorrie xianyun.. i noe i neglected ur feelings.. i'm jus tired.. i dun even hav time 4 myself.. sobx(T.T).. jus attended my BTC on e 16th.. was pretti gd.. quite interestin actuall.. n got 2 noe a few gers from byakuren as well.. i hav been in e byakuren 4 more than half yrs time le.. yet.. i dun realli mani pple there.. except e same few old frenz.. but my relation wif e byakuren chief quite gd.. kekez.. tat's suprising yeah??
as a co-ordinator in my soka kinder yr end concert, i was realised tat i got mani thingys 2 do.. haiz.. jus feel super stressed lohz.. haiz.. n.. i'll b appointed as my district's leader in my district in august.. but.. i'll hav alread been involved in e plannin.. 2dae was my discussion meetin.. i performed quite well actuall.. hahaz.. sound i'm like praisin myself.. but was given too little time 2 prepare.. jus had our plannin on mondae.. n had my homevisit on wed.. n went 2 e lders' study meetin on thurs.. n attend my dad's han's discussion meetin.. so realli no time..
actuall wanna slp a bit longer 2dae b4 attendin my discussion meetin at 2pm de.. end up.. was awaken by didi's noise n xueyun's sms.. n rush down 2 tsc 2 c e golden lion's training.. wanna invite them 2 perform durin our alumni yr end concert..
oh no.. i'm sick.. havin bad flu.. n tml.. goin back 2 work again... haiz.. sianz.. i jus wanna go back 2 sch.. n pursue my interest.. haiz.. e dream seems so far..
Saturday, July 08, 2006
[ another dae of hope..... ]
[ another dae of hope..... ]
jus like all other daes.. 2dae is a fresh new dae.. n another dae of hope.. been veri busi spendin every single weekend havin soka activities.. last sat.. jus hav a meet up wif my soka kinder chinese teacher who is alread e vice-pricinple of e sch.. she's e teacher-in-charge 4 our yr end alumni concert.. wif her alone, she cant do much.. so she jus great helper like mi.. lolx.. kiddin.. great ex-students as helpers lahz.. e main commitee members r xueyun,mi,may,pinwen n elvin.. 2 more nv cum.. they r stella n penny.. xueyun is e veri head person.. she's e program director 4 tis event.. as 4 mi.. big task as well.. co-ordinator.. haiz.. lotsa thingy 2 do.. n then rush down 2 hq 2 meet benn.. 2 get sum stuff from him.. lolx.. seems so long i last c him le.. haiz.. last sun.. went down 4 e milkrun event.. representin soka there 4 a dance event.. realli hav a great time though e weather is pretti warm.. n i'm havin flu..
tis week has almost cum 2 an end.. 2dae seems 2 b my onli free dae.. yet.. i didnt cum hm early 2 slp.. i went shop shop wif yun at orchard.. thouhgh there's quite a lot of work 2 do.. i still left early.. oops.. feel bad.. dunoe if my director will b angry not.. hack care lahz.. weekend cum.. i mus rest.. haiz.. tired.. my legs r aching from cramps.. had our lunch at sakura cuisine.. ate a claypot tom yam guitao,oats prawns n hotplate beancurd.. oh no.. tat's a pretti big share of lunch.. luckily i didnt take breakfast.. haiz.. i hav made up my mind le.. i wanna jian fei.. cos i realised i dun look as cute as i was when i'm young.. hahaz.. let's take a look at my baby fotos..
jus like all other daes.. 2dae is a fresh new dae.. n another dae of hope.. been veri busi spendin every single weekend havin soka activities.. last sat.. jus hav a meet up wif my soka kinder chinese teacher who is alread e vice-pricinple of e sch.. she's e teacher-in-charge 4 our yr end alumni concert.. wif her alone, she cant do much.. so she jus great helper like mi.. lolx.. kiddin.. great ex-students as helpers lahz.. e main commitee members r xueyun,mi,may,pinwen n elvin.. 2 more nv cum.. they r stella n penny.. xueyun is e veri head person.. she's e program director 4 tis event.. as 4 mi.. big task as well.. co-ordinator.. haiz.. lotsa thingy 2 do.. n then rush down 2 hq 2 meet benn.. 2 get sum stuff from him.. lolx.. seems so long i last c him le.. haiz.. last sun.. went down 4 e milkrun event.. representin soka there 4 a dance event.. realli hav a great time though e weather is pretti warm.. n i'm havin flu..
tis week has almost cum 2 an end.. 2dae seems 2 b my onli free dae.. yet.. i didnt cum hm early 2 slp.. i went shop shop wif yun at orchard.. thouhgh there's quite a lot of work 2 do.. i still left early.. oops.. feel bad.. dunoe if my director will b angry not.. hack care lahz.. weekend cum.. i mus rest.. haiz.. tired.. my legs r aching from cramps.. had our lunch at sakura cuisine.. ate a claypot tom yam guitao,oats prawns n hotplate beancurd.. oh no.. tat's a pretti big share of lunch.. luckily i didnt take breakfast.. haiz.. i hav made up my mind le.. i wanna jian fei.. cos i realised i dun look as cute as i was when i'm young.. hahaz.. let's take a look at my baby fotos..
e 1st pic was mi when i was a yr old.. n e 2nd pic is when i'm 3 yrs old..cute rite?? lolx.. now.. i dun find myself cute anymore.. i jus change a lot.. guess e onli way 2 look prettier,healthy n cutier is 2 slim down ba.. hahaz.. my resolution.. 2 slim down.. yes.. tis time i'm serious.. got 2 noe quite a no. of new frenz thru e milkrun event.. realli happi 2 noe all of them.. n i'm transferring from asd 2 nrpsd le.. cos now.. i got frenz at nrpsd.. i'm not alone.. actuall i'm workin le.. but i jus dunoe y.. my name was in asd list.. now.. i dun realli hav frenz in asd.. so i decided 2 transfer 2 nrpsd so at least i can still attend sd meetings regularly wif xueyun..
went 2 pei xianyun take her contact lens 2dae.. n got a 5days acuvue define free lens from uncle alan.. it's sample 4 us 2 test lahz.. hahaz.. it's transparent de.. guess i'll hav a hard time wearing it.. still prefer coloured lens.. a bit tired.. stomach having cramp.. tml havin mbers kenshu at jurong kaikan.. almost went 2 e wrong place.. cos i tot is senja kaikan.. lolx.. luckily steph sms mi.. goin 2 attend btc next cumin sun.. n will b appointed as leaders in aug.. it's a veri special yr tis yr.. cos we r celebratin e 55th ywd n ymd formation dae tis yr.. keez.. n i'm markin on a new journey.. jus i wun b alone..
my district leader left my district in jan tis yr.. she nv even notify mi.. i'm her mber n veri close fren.. i'm jus so upset n angry over tat.. bcos of tat.. as a person who gone thru tat.. i tell myself: i'm not gonna abandon my mbers no matter wat happened.. i grow up mature wif my mbers 2gether.. i'll bring them wif mi n not neglect them.. it's veri painful lostin a pillar of support.. i wun let history repeat.. work been goin quite okie 4 mi.. jus sumtimes, i'm can b quite careless at work... not bcos i'm not xi xin enough.. it's jus over careful tat i'll make small n veri careless mistake.. but those stupid mistakes made mite lead mi 2 bearin a veri big responsiblity.. guess i shld chant harder 2 make sure my work goes smoothly n get my increment tis yr end.. haiz.. i jus wanna go back 2 sch n study like all my other frenz..
my ambition is 2 b a teacher.. i love kids.. truely love kids.. so i wanna start off wif teachin kinder n nursey kids.. then 2 pri n sec... i love doin volunteer works.. i dunoe i realli love helpin pple.. until when i was in sec 3, i'm hav 2 serve at e special sch.. when i'm takin care of e special kids.. i noe n realised i love volunteer works.. when i was in sec4, i took a quiz 2 find jobs tat suits my character.. jobs like nurse, social work, teacher n mani volunteer works n government jobs came out.. even teachers in sch sae i look like a social worker.. none of them seems 2 believe i'm in engineering line now.. 2 mani of e teachers.. i'm a decent n obedient ger wif kind heart i believe?? hahaz.. so when after teachin mi n my bro.. they dun believe we r blood related.. cos we jus possess diff character.. kekez.. my didi veri noti.. mani of e teachers dun believe he's my blood related bro.. kekez.. funny rite??
so i hope.. 1 dae.. i can pursue my studies.. n get a job of my interest.. n.. i oso hope 2 go 2 soka university in japan 2 study.. but guess tis dream seems veri far from mi.. n i noe it's gettin further away from mi ba.. a sense of hope is all i need..
P.S. A little of LOVE n COURAGE is all i ask 4 from u..
Saturday, July 01, 2006
[ havin a tough time ]
[ havin a tough time.... ]
been havin a tough time few weeks.. been so involved in soka activities every week end tat i hav realli hav no spare time 4 myself n my best bud ah yun.. so sorrie abt tat.. seems 2 neglected u.. will be havin my appointment tis month as district leader le.. guess i gonna b more busi.. as 4 him.. my heart seems 2 fly there alread.. now.. mayb i'm jus tired..i'm alwaz so restless at work.. even my boss oso noticed liao... die.. mus do sum reflection liao le.. i jus wanna shop badly but i jus dun hav time 2 do.. i wanna shop 4 my office clothes oso.. haiz..
gonna c u 2dae.. though had realli got beta btw e 2 of us.. but i jus dunoe wat 2 tok 2 u abt when i c u face 2 face.. guess i'll b tongue twist?? definitely will ba.. thankie 4 bein so sweet 2 mi.. n thankie 4 bein more concern abt mi.. it will realli motivate mi 2 move on.. though mani a times u arent wif mi.. but i noe u will give mi moral support jus like i will rite?? r we realli possible.. xue yun sae we will wif e help of gohonzon rite?? i'll chant double hard 4 u... n thankie xue yun 4 comfortin mi.. u r realli sum1 i can share my gakkai n personal stuff wif.. heez..
hmmm.. gonna start work soon le.. jus hope tat everythingy will go smoothly.. n pray tat e dance performance at zouk will b a great success.. cheers~
been havin a tough time few weeks.. been so involved in soka activities every week end tat i hav realli hav no spare time 4 myself n my best bud ah yun.. so sorrie abt tat.. seems 2 neglected u.. will be havin my appointment tis month as district leader le.. guess i gonna b more busi.. as 4 him.. my heart seems 2 fly there alread.. now.. mayb i'm jus tired..i'm alwaz so restless at work.. even my boss oso noticed liao... die.. mus do sum reflection liao le.. i jus wanna shop badly but i jus dun hav time 2 do.. i wanna shop 4 my office clothes oso.. haiz..
gonna c u 2dae.. though had realli got beta btw e 2 of us.. but i jus dunoe wat 2 tok 2 u abt when i c u face 2 face.. guess i'll b tongue twist?? definitely will ba.. thankie 4 bein so sweet 2 mi.. n thankie 4 bein more concern abt mi.. it will realli motivate mi 2 move on.. though mani a times u arent wif mi.. but i noe u will give mi moral support jus like i will rite?? r we realli possible.. xue yun sae we will wif e help of gohonzon rite?? i'll chant double hard 4 u... n thankie xue yun 4 comfortin mi.. u r realli sum1 i can share my gakkai n personal stuff wif.. heez..
hmmm.. gonna start work soon le.. jus hope tat everythingy will go smoothly.. n pray tat e dance performance at zouk will b a great success.. cheers~
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
u give mi hope n smash them in2 pieces again
[u give mi hope n smash them in2 pieces again]
i seems restless 2dae.. u give mi hope.. n smash them again.. u alwaz go MIA.. mayb i'm wrong again.. i jus cant force u.. how am i goin 2 face u?? ur bdae cumin in a mth time.. will u invite mi?? will u?? if i c u tis cumin wkend.. should i greet u?? or should i avoid?? it's confusin mi.. thank u 4 givin mi all e encouragement, care n concern.. i realli appreciate it.. mayb we will jus remain like tis 4ever ba.. remain in tis state.. tis status.. we r nv close.. i alwaz tot we r close.. veri close frenz.. but we r not.. i'm e one bein concern 4 all ur stuff.. but 2 u.. my stuff r my business ba..
haiz.. wat should i do?? 2dae work quite occupied.. at least i'm doin my job- drawing.. lolx.. though i noe pple still questionin my ability.. but i new 2 everythingy.. i need time badly.. lolx.. last week got a new guy workin under my dad.. lolx.. he realli looks like jay chou.. his looks.. his hairstyle.. e way he work oso.. lolx.. but he got hearin impaired.. oh no.. wat a pity rite?? hmmm.. but too old 4 mi.. b my bro is a beta choice.. nv tok 2 him b4.. so dunoe wat kinda person is he... but he smokes.. though my 1st impression quite gd.. but 2nd impression but gd liao.. i jus dislike pple who smokes..
got hearin impaired still dunoe how 2 cherish life.. wat is tat?? haiz.. i'm upset.. veri upset.. can any1 cheer mi up???
i seems restless 2dae.. u give mi hope.. n smash them again.. u alwaz go MIA.. mayb i'm wrong again.. i jus cant force u.. how am i goin 2 face u?? ur bdae cumin in a mth time.. will u invite mi?? will u?? if i c u tis cumin wkend.. should i greet u?? or should i avoid?? it's confusin mi.. thank u 4 givin mi all e encouragement, care n concern.. i realli appreciate it.. mayb we will jus remain like tis 4ever ba.. remain in tis state.. tis status.. we r nv close.. i alwaz tot we r close.. veri close frenz.. but we r not.. i'm e one bein concern 4 all ur stuff.. but 2 u.. my stuff r my business ba..
haiz.. wat should i do?? 2dae work quite occupied.. at least i'm doin my job- drawing.. lolx.. though i noe pple still questionin my ability.. but i new 2 everythingy.. i need time badly.. lolx.. last week got a new guy workin under my dad.. lolx.. he realli looks like jay chou.. his looks.. his hairstyle.. e way he work oso.. lolx.. but he got hearin impaired.. oh no.. wat a pity rite?? hmmm.. but too old 4 mi.. b my bro is a beta choice.. nv tok 2 him b4.. so dunoe wat kinda person is he... but he smokes.. though my 1st impression quite gd.. but 2nd impression but gd liao.. i jus dislike pple who smokes..
got hearin impaired still dunoe how 2 cherish life.. wat is tat?? haiz.. i'm upset.. veri upset.. can any1 cheer mi up???
Monday, June 12, 2006
LIVING WITH REGRETS......
LIVING WITH REGRETS........
tis few daes veri busi.. yester work till 1.30.. cos co co nv cum work.. summore got drawings need 2 draw.. i jus do my veri best 2 draw it out.. till hav 2 pick up calls 4 e admin oso.. mutli-taskin.. haiz.. then hav 2 rush 2 tampines kaikan 4 e youth peace lecture on e topic "e triumph of mentor-disciple spirit".. e speaker is soka(india)'s president.. dun realli seems 2 catch him well.. cos of his essen.. plus.. i'm jus tired.. after which.. went 2 eat sakae sushi wif anna, yvonne n another fren whom i 4got e name.. oh gosh.. lolx.. saw ah mui there oso.. she seems happi workin there.. i'm happi 4 her too.. then went hm.. slept quite early.. abt 10 plus i'm alread in bed..
2dae.. woke up quite early too.. cos goin down 2 telok blangah 2 chant.. every sun we hav mornin daimoku/gongyo session from 8am to 9am.. n i was late.. cos of e stupid bus.. but late is alwaz beta than nv turn up.. i jus hardly c any youngsters goin.. 2 mani of them.. sundae is 2 slp as late as they can.. n wake up wif a fresh mind 4 shoppin.. lolx(=.=!!).. after which.. went 2 out book store n bought a book entitled " a piece of mirror".. gonna finish it in 4 daes time no matter wat happened.. cos tis cumin thurs is my 2nd ywd plannin meetin 4 our june's ywd discussion meetin on e 24th.. yvonne treat mi 2 eat dim sum at raffles place tat side.. quite nice.. realli veri long nv eat dim sum liao le.. mayb bcos i'm cantonese ba.. so i love dim sum a lot.. heez(>.<)..
after which.. yvonne went 4 gym.. haiz.. she got free 1 mth membership wanna give mi.. but i'm under 21.. so cannot go.. oh.. so sad(x.x).. i almost fall aslp at e gym there waitin 4 her.. after which.. went 2 her office wif her.. she wanna grab sum stuff done.. then took mrt 2 tampines kaikan 4 2dae's women's peace lecture on e topic " e future lies wif women ".. learnt quite a no of stuff thru e 2 talks.. though is still e same speaker.. lolx(^.^).. after which went 2 eat genki sushi wif them.. it's realli bad.. worse than sakae de.. yvonne realli regret.. n she looks so upset.. haiz.. wat a pity.. nv take pic wif them though i hav camera wif mi.. sobx sobx (T.T)..
took 969 from tampines back hm.. on e bus.. i realli tink a lot.. yvonne kept askin mi 2 go back 2 studies again.. she sae i musnt give up my education bcos of my work.. haiz.. it isnt i dun wan 2 study.. i love 2.. i wish 2.. i wan 2.. i wan 2 go back 2 sch jus like others.. but i cant.. finiancially no.. i cant affect 2 go back 2 sch n give up my job.. i cant even hav e ability 2 study n work at e same time.. time is too consumin 4 my life.. thru out tis 17 over yrs i'm been livin.. i jus realised i got lotsa regrets.. regrets in studies.. regrets in my work.. regrets in my personal love life..
i regret not puttin enough efforts in my studies.. if i do well, i mite not hav 2 work.. i mite hav 2 give up my ambition, my dream.. i mite hav 2 suffer so much.. i mite not hav b force 2 do thingys i hate.. i mite not hav 2 work a longer path than others.. i mite hav 2 give up on e one i love.. now tat i hav switch department.. i hav 2 learn 2 adapt 2 e new enviroment again.. tat's wat i hate.. i dun love 2 learn all over again.. i dun like 2 learn crawling again.. pple r flyin, so y mus i crawl?? quite sum time ago, i feel like movin out.. but i noe i cant survive..
2 mani pple ard mi mite hav e impression tat i'm courageous, daring, confident, determined n independent ger.. especiall those soka frenz of mine.. hahaz.. sorrie 2 sae.. i'm not wat u tink.. i seems courageous from my actions.. i seems daring from my style of workin.. i seems confident from my tone of words.. i seems determined from my thinking.. n.. i seems independent .. but it's all illusion.. cos i not.. i'm oso weak.. weak at times..
cumin 2 relation.. haiz.. well.. i'm quite gd in handlin frenship.. but cums 2 love.. oh no.. wat a mess!! my 1st stead.. he like mi 1st.. so i choose e one who love mi.. 2nd stead.. he oso like mi 1st.. again.. i choose e one who love mi.. my 3rd stead.. oso e same.. i choose e one who love mi.. my 4th stead.. oso like mi 1st.. again.. i choose e one who love mi more than i love him.. e 5th one.. oso.. e same.. y mus i choose e one who love mi?? y cant i choose e one i love??
u neglected mi.. u broke ur promise.. u abandoned mi.. u sae.. u sae if i need ur help.. u give ur fullest support.. but u nv.. u r alwaz MIA.. missing in action.. u r alwaz busi.. i wanna tell u my probz.. i wanna share wif u my happiness.. my sorrows.. liar.. big liar.. mayb i'm wrong.. wrong 2 keep u in my heart.. wrong 2 tink of u.. wrong 2 spare a though 4 u.. wrong 2 noe u.. i'm tired..
tis few daes veri busi.. yester work till 1.30.. cos co co nv cum work.. summore got drawings need 2 draw.. i jus do my veri best 2 draw it out.. till hav 2 pick up calls 4 e admin oso.. mutli-taskin.. haiz.. then hav 2 rush 2 tampines kaikan 4 e youth peace lecture on e topic "e triumph of mentor-disciple spirit".. e speaker is soka(india)'s president.. dun realli seems 2 catch him well.. cos of his essen.. plus.. i'm jus tired.. after which.. went 2 eat sakae sushi wif anna, yvonne n another fren whom i 4got e name.. oh gosh.. lolx.. saw ah mui there oso.. she seems happi workin there.. i'm happi 4 her too.. then went hm.. slept quite early.. abt 10 plus i'm alread in bed..
2dae.. woke up quite early too.. cos goin down 2 telok blangah 2 chant.. every sun we hav mornin daimoku/gongyo session from 8am to 9am.. n i was late.. cos of e stupid bus.. but late is alwaz beta than nv turn up.. i jus hardly c any youngsters goin.. 2 mani of them.. sundae is 2 slp as late as they can.. n wake up wif a fresh mind 4 shoppin.. lolx(=.=!!).. after which.. went 2 out book store n bought a book entitled " a piece of mirror".. gonna finish it in 4 daes time no matter wat happened.. cos tis cumin thurs is my 2nd ywd plannin meetin 4 our june's ywd discussion meetin on e 24th.. yvonne treat mi 2 eat dim sum at raffles place tat side.. quite nice.. realli veri long nv eat dim sum liao le.. mayb bcos i'm cantonese ba.. so i love dim sum a lot.. heez(>.<)..
after which.. yvonne went 4 gym.. haiz.. she got free 1 mth membership wanna give mi.. but i'm under 21.. so cannot go.. oh.. so sad(x.x).. i almost fall aslp at e gym there waitin 4 her.. after which.. went 2 her office wif her.. she wanna grab sum stuff done.. then took mrt 2 tampines kaikan 4 2dae's women's peace lecture on e topic " e future lies wif women ".. learnt quite a no of stuff thru e 2 talks.. though is still e same speaker.. lolx(^.^).. after which went 2 eat genki sushi wif them.. it's realli bad.. worse than sakae de.. yvonne realli regret.. n she looks so upset.. haiz.. wat a pity.. nv take pic wif them though i hav camera wif mi.. sobx sobx (T.T)..
took 969 from tampines back hm.. on e bus.. i realli tink a lot.. yvonne kept askin mi 2 go back 2 studies again.. she sae i musnt give up my education bcos of my work.. haiz.. it isnt i dun wan 2 study.. i love 2.. i wish 2.. i wan 2.. i wan 2 go back 2 sch jus like others.. but i cant.. finiancially no.. i cant affect 2 go back 2 sch n give up my job.. i cant even hav e ability 2 study n work at e same time.. time is too consumin 4 my life.. thru out tis 17 over yrs i'm been livin.. i jus realised i got lotsa regrets.. regrets in studies.. regrets in my work.. regrets in my personal love life..
i regret not puttin enough efforts in my studies.. if i do well, i mite not hav 2 work.. i mite hav 2 give up my ambition, my dream.. i mite hav 2 suffer so much.. i mite not hav b force 2 do thingys i hate.. i mite not hav 2 work a longer path than others.. i mite hav 2 give up on e one i love.. now tat i hav switch department.. i hav 2 learn 2 adapt 2 e new enviroment again.. tat's wat i hate.. i dun love 2 learn all over again.. i dun like 2 learn crawling again.. pple r flyin, so y mus i crawl?? quite sum time ago, i feel like movin out.. but i noe i cant survive..
2 mani pple ard mi mite hav e impression tat i'm courageous, daring, confident, determined n independent ger.. especiall those soka frenz of mine.. hahaz.. sorrie 2 sae.. i'm not wat u tink.. i seems courageous from my actions.. i seems daring from my style of workin.. i seems confident from my tone of words.. i seems determined from my thinking.. n.. i seems independent .. but it's all illusion.. cos i not.. i'm oso weak.. weak at times..
cumin 2 relation.. haiz.. well.. i'm quite gd in handlin frenship.. but cums 2 love.. oh no.. wat a mess!! my 1st stead.. he like mi 1st.. so i choose e one who love mi.. 2nd stead.. he oso like mi 1st.. again.. i choose e one who love mi.. my 3rd stead.. oso e same.. i choose e one who love mi.. my 4th stead.. oso like mi 1st.. again.. i choose e one who love mi more than i love him.. e 5th one.. oso.. e same.. y mus i choose e one who love mi?? y cant i choose e one i love??
u neglected mi.. u broke ur promise.. u abandoned mi.. u sae.. u sae if i need ur help.. u give ur fullest support.. but u nv.. u r alwaz MIA.. missing in action.. u r alwaz busi.. i wanna tell u my probz.. i wanna share wif u my happiness.. my sorrows.. liar.. big liar.. mayb i'm wrong.. wrong 2 keep u in my heart.. wrong 2 tink of u.. wrong 2 spare a though 4 u.. wrong 2 noe u.. i'm tired..
Thursday, May 25, 2006
OH YES!!!
[ OH YES!!!!! ]
oh yes.. finally i left e state of hell.. i mean my old department wif 2 brain sick pple.. now i'm adaptin wif in e new department wif e help of my new senior Co Co.. well.. though i still need 2 help out in qa.. but old man.. i no longer under ur control.. yes.. thankie 4 freein mi gohonzon.. realli thankie uncle roger ( my boss ) 4 switchin department 4 mi.. i'm realli grateful 4 tis arrangement.. though i noe other conflict mite arise sooner or later.. but i promise.. now.. my whole heart will onli b devoted 2 work.. i wun care wat's happenin ard mi in e company.. now tat i hav a carefree life again.. i'll cherish tis opportunity tat had been given 2 mi.. i noe tis opportunity dun cum easy..
last fri.. when my boss told mi tat he wanna switch mi 2 design n ask 4 my view.. i agreed wifout givin it a 2nd tot.. cos i noe.. tat will definitely b a brighter future 4 mi.. 1 n a half yrs in e qa deparment.. all i did everydae is takin cutters, clean it n pack it.. then do sum admin stuff like filin work orders.. orderin rose plastics n plastic bags 4 e packin.. jus like a coolie like tat.. now.. i'm a designer.. oh yes.. designer okie.. though still veri junior lahz.. but i feel is a gd start.. lolx.. nv noe Co Co oso hate old man so much.. i noe dad will let u die a slow death.. so i hav no worries.. muahahaz.... 2gether wif ur "beloved ger".. cause n effect.. u shall bear e consequences 4 wat u hav done.. create e CAUSE n bear e EFFECT.. stop shitting ard in e company.. it's makin pple ard stinkin..
startin 2 draw sum simple cutters alread.. alread 3 types of cutters le.. still copin well.. 2dae alread start drawin le.. cos sum of e cutters dun hav drawin avaliable.. jus sum simple ones.. but i enjoy.. n i feel proud seein my name on e drawin itself.. old man.. watch out 4 my name.. i'm not jus jessica loh onli.. i'll make my name proud.. n step u on2 e ground.. i'll prove u wrong n proud those who look down on mi n my name.. so dun under estimate my ability.. i'm capable of doin big thingys.. will onli b departin 4 germany when i get familiar wif e designin part.. so wun b leavin soon le.. my trip will b delay.. no worries.. i'm happi in e state i am now.. dad is rite.. movin hse can make lotsa thingy change.. my life jus turn 360degrees wif in few daes time..
hav been tokin 2 my senior abt his love life.. lolx.. jus feelin empty all a sudden.. but i noe i'm tired of tokin abt relation now.. i jus wan 2 live peacefully....... as 4 relation, i shall leave it 2 fate.. i jus hav enough of sufferings.. i wanna enjoy 2 more yrs of teenage life peacefully.. so jus leave mi alone.. all i need is frenz, family n my work.. n tat's all.. guess my wish is simple enough ba??
Monday, May 15, 2006
[ a new place, a new start ]
[ a new place, a new start ]
everythingy gonna b a new start 4 mi.. i hav jus shifted from Clementi's 3-rm flat (my old hse) to my new 4-rm flat in Yishun.. a new place, a new start.. everythingy gonna start afresh.. i cant realli slp.. mayb bcos i'm slpin on my new bed.. no lahz.. onli new matress.. smell diff.. plus.. it's a 4-rm flat.. so i'm hav my own rm.. my own space.. a bit not used 2 it lahz.. lyin on my bed every nitez.. i tot of e past.. tot of my sch daes.. tot of e dae wif him ard.. my tears drop.. drop automatically..
last fri on vesak dae.. while pple r usin it as a shoppin or restin dae.. my whole family went 2 our new flat 2 do sum last min clearin up 4 our flat.. tian ming ( my dad n my collengue) actuall help mi n my family a lot.. i'm realli grateful abt it.. dunoe how 2 thankie him oso.. he actuall sacrified his time 4 movie 2 drive my dad back 2 my old flat 2 move sum electrical appliances 2 our new flat.. uncle lim gave my dad a fish tank wif a rack.. guess wat.. my dad didnt realised tat i was tat strong.. until he saw mi helpin him 2 move e fish rack.. lolx.. back at our old flat at nitez.. was packin my stuff n helpin my mom n dad.. n guess wat.. i slept at 2am in e mornin.. cos of my useless brother.. cos of e dust.. he kept sneezin.. n he went 2 slp.. pple busyin.. he went 2 buy supper eat.. after eatin he went 2 slp.. realli make mi angry..
woke up at 5.50am 4 work.. actuall i suppose 2 take leave on sat de.. but.. wat 2 do.. i cant take so mani daes.. plus vesak dae jus over onli.. haiz.. wat is tat man?? got annual leave oso cannot take.. haiz.. a bit upset over tat.. on sat.. i took time-off.. n bcos of tat 1 ½ hrs time-off.. i lost my 30bucks allowance.. if i take leave or mc.. cos i hav alread hav medical leave n annual leave.. they wun cut my 30bucks allowance.. but once i take time-off.. tat's e end of it.. haiz.. sianz..
i left e company at 11am on sat (14/05).. n took a cab back wif my dad.. then we again.. started 2 throw our unwanted stuff.. n pack my wanted stuff.. till abt 1.30 lyk tat.. e pple came.. they started 2 move out out stuff.. till abt 5pm.. then we r able 2 clear our stuff 2 e void deck 1st.. plus e lorry 4 hse removal spoilt.. so we actuall waited unpatiently 4 it 2 cum.. mi n my mom took a cab up there 1st.. cos we hav 2 clear e space 4 them.. when they arrive at yishun.. it's alread 7plus.. oh gosh.. end up.. my dad, bro n mi oso lend our hand 2 move e boxes n furniture.. till abt 9plus.. everythingy is move in2 e rm.. now our flat is in a mess..
we went 2 bed at ard 2 am again.. again okie.. oh no.. yester i slp onli abt 4hrs.. yet.. i not mentally tired.. jus physically tired.. hav cramp n aches all over.. but onli managed 2 slp at 5am in e mornin.. haiz.. n woke up at 9plus in e mornin 2 hav breakfast n buy so stuff we need.. another dae of onli 4hrs slp.. haiyo.. i'm havin dark eye rings now.. we went 2 chong pang 4 breakfast.. n buy sum extra bright bulbs 4 our hse.. n back at hm.. we started packin again.. i started hangin my own clothes.. n all a sudden.. i jus bcame e in charge 4 clothes.. i helped mom hang hers oso.. oh gosh.. her clothes realli alot.. double tat of mine.. double worz.. then i started cleanin my study table n e cabinets 4 my books.. n start 2 unpack my stuff.. it's unpacked, unpacked, n unpacked again.. onli mananged 2 hav my lunch at almost 6pm le.. tat oso bcame my dinner..
after dad left hm 4 e wake.. my mom, my didi n i went 2 central.. 2 withdraw money n we went 2 e fairprice at yishun mrt oso.. bought sum milo n stuff back oso.. back at hm.. i sweep e floor n mop it oso.. my mom sae.. 1st time c mi sweepin n moppin e floor everydae.. ever since i start 2 clean up tis floor.. i'm alwaz e one sweepin n moppin e floor.. cleanin e windows as well.. i jus suddenly bcum so motivated 4 household chores.. lolx(=.=!!).. after doin e household chores.. i help 2 unpack my didi n my mom's clothes again.. we actuall went 2 bed at almost 12am le.. i jus cant slp.. till abt 2am.. then i managed 2 fall asleep.. n woke up at 9plus.. i'll b back at e old flat later 2 retrieve sum of out stuff again.. gtg le.. i'm tired~
"It is an illusion to think that we can find happiness by going to some other place, far away from our present reality. Our happiness is determined by our mindset. If we resolve that the place where we are right now is the perfect place for carrying out our Buddhist practice, and if we challenge ourselves there, then that place will become the "Capital of Eternally Tranquil Light". It will shine as a bright citadel of happiness"
=> above is a guidance i read in daily sensei guidance.. it's veri meanin..
everythingy gonna b a new start 4 mi.. i hav jus shifted from Clementi's 3-rm flat (my old hse) to my new 4-rm flat in Yishun.. a new place, a new start.. everythingy gonna start afresh.. i cant realli slp.. mayb bcos i'm slpin on my new bed.. no lahz.. onli new matress.. smell diff.. plus.. it's a 4-rm flat.. so i'm hav my own rm.. my own space.. a bit not used 2 it lahz.. lyin on my bed every nitez.. i tot of e past.. tot of my sch daes.. tot of e dae wif him ard.. my tears drop.. drop automatically..
last fri on vesak dae.. while pple r usin it as a shoppin or restin dae.. my whole family went 2 our new flat 2 do sum last min clearin up 4 our flat.. tian ming ( my dad n my collengue) actuall help mi n my family a lot.. i'm realli grateful abt it.. dunoe how 2 thankie him oso.. he actuall sacrified his time 4 movie 2 drive my dad back 2 my old flat 2 move sum electrical appliances 2 our new flat.. uncle lim gave my dad a fish tank wif a rack.. guess wat.. my dad didnt realised tat i was tat strong.. until he saw mi helpin him 2 move e fish rack.. lolx.. back at our old flat at nitez.. was packin my stuff n helpin my mom n dad.. n guess wat.. i slept at 2am in e mornin.. cos of my useless brother.. cos of e dust.. he kept sneezin.. n he went 2 slp.. pple busyin.. he went 2 buy supper eat.. after eatin he went 2 slp.. realli make mi angry..
woke up at 5.50am 4 work.. actuall i suppose 2 take leave on sat de.. but.. wat 2 do.. i cant take so mani daes.. plus vesak dae jus over onli.. haiz.. wat is tat man?? got annual leave oso cannot take.. haiz.. a bit upset over tat.. on sat.. i took time-off.. n bcos of tat 1 ½ hrs time-off.. i lost my 30bucks allowance.. if i take leave or mc.. cos i hav alread hav medical leave n annual leave.. they wun cut my 30bucks allowance.. but once i take time-off.. tat's e end of it.. haiz.. sianz..
i left e company at 11am on sat (14/05).. n took a cab back wif my dad.. then we again.. started 2 throw our unwanted stuff.. n pack my wanted stuff.. till abt 1.30 lyk tat.. e pple came.. they started 2 move out out stuff.. till abt 5pm.. then we r able 2 clear our stuff 2 e void deck 1st.. plus e lorry 4 hse removal spoilt.. so we actuall waited unpatiently 4 it 2 cum.. mi n my mom took a cab up there 1st.. cos we hav 2 clear e space 4 them.. when they arrive at yishun.. it's alread 7plus.. oh gosh.. end up.. my dad, bro n mi oso lend our hand 2 move e boxes n furniture.. till abt 9plus.. everythingy is move in2 e rm.. now our flat is in a mess..
we went 2 bed at ard 2 am again.. again okie.. oh no.. yester i slp onli abt 4hrs.. yet.. i not mentally tired.. jus physically tired.. hav cramp n aches all over.. but onli managed 2 slp at 5am in e mornin.. haiz.. n woke up at 9plus in e mornin 2 hav breakfast n buy so stuff we need.. another dae of onli 4hrs slp.. haiyo.. i'm havin dark eye rings now.. we went 2 chong pang 4 breakfast.. n buy sum extra bright bulbs 4 our hse.. n back at hm.. we started packin again.. i started hangin my own clothes.. n all a sudden.. i jus bcame e in charge 4 clothes.. i helped mom hang hers oso.. oh gosh.. her clothes realli alot.. double tat of mine.. double worz.. then i started cleanin my study table n e cabinets 4 my books.. n start 2 unpack my stuff.. it's unpacked, unpacked, n unpacked again.. onli mananged 2 hav my lunch at almost 6pm le.. tat oso bcame my dinner..
after dad left hm 4 e wake.. my mom, my didi n i went 2 central.. 2 withdraw money n we went 2 e fairprice at yishun mrt oso.. bought sum milo n stuff back oso.. back at hm.. i sweep e floor n mop it oso.. my mom sae.. 1st time c mi sweepin n moppin e floor everydae.. ever since i start 2 clean up tis floor.. i'm alwaz e one sweepin n moppin e floor.. cleanin e windows as well.. i jus suddenly bcum so motivated 4 household chores.. lolx(=.=!!).. after doin e household chores.. i help 2 unpack my didi n my mom's clothes again.. we actuall went 2 bed at almost 12am le.. i jus cant slp.. till abt 2am.. then i managed 2 fall asleep.. n woke up at 9plus.. i'll b back at e old flat later 2 retrieve sum of out stuff again.. gtg le.. i'm tired~
"It is an illusion to think that we can find happiness by going to some other place, far away from our present reality. Our happiness is determined by our mindset. If we resolve that the place where we are right now is the perfect place for carrying out our Buddhist practice, and if we challenge ourselves there, then that place will become the "Capital of Eternally Tranquil Light". It will shine as a bright citadel of happiness"
=> above is a guidance i read in daily sensei guidance.. it's veri meanin..
Friday, May 12, 2006
i'm runnin away from u........
[ i'm runnin away frm u.... ]
i'm runnin away.. yes.. i'm runnin away from u.. no actuall lahz.. i'm jus shiftin hm le.. when i was young.. i'm stayin at bukit batok.. jus opp stephanie's place.. under my block there's a police post.. at e age of 5 (yr 1993).. i moved 2 clementi.. my current venue.. under my block, there's oso a police post.. in e yr 1998.. which is after 5 yrs, my dad sold e clementi flat 2 my uncle.. but we been stayin here till now.. cos he is alwaz overseas workin.. therefore.. we didnt move out.. plus last time my dad's workplace is near my hse.. n mi n my didi is schooling here..
now.. pple is back.. we jus hav 2 move out no matter wat.. i hav been stayin near 4 13yrs.. but.. i still e flat in bukit batok.. e livin rm damn big.. though now i movin in2 a 4-rm flat as well.. but e livin rm seems smaller than e 4-rm flat in bukit batok.. mayb when i'm young, things look bigger.. lolx(=.=!!).. tml.. yes tml.. which is e 13th of may.. i movin 2 yishun le.. is our flat bought 8yrs again.. but i hav nv stayed in there b4.. n under e block dun hav police post oso.. feel so weird.. haiz.. plus.. from yishun mrt station.. i hav 2 walk hm.. yes.. walk hm.. summore it takes mi abt 10mins lohz.. oh gosh.. i jus cant imagine when i'm so tired.. i still hav 2 walk..
mom is a bit worried 4 mi.. cos when i go 4 soka activties.. none of centres r near my place.. in other words.. i'll b returnin hm late after meeting.. she worried tat i hav 2 walk hm alone.. quite quiet.. but got coffeeshops.. i'm jus afraid 2 meet drunk drinkers onli.. alamak.. if i noe i'm goin hm late.. i wun dare 2 wear skirts tat dae.. lolx.. a bit worried.. everything gonna b a mess 4 mi.. haiz(@.@)..
actuall my intent is 2 take 3.5 daes leave.. startin from tml half dae 2 next wed.. but my idiotic manager dare not approve my leave.. cos he sae it's too mani daes.. so he went 2 speak 2 my director.. even uncle jonathan ( my director) oso sidin him.. haiz.. no choice lohz.. i'm FORCED.. i repeat.. FORCED 2 cut down e no of daes of my leave.. in e end.. i decided 2 work tml.. n take 1 hr time off.. n take 2 daes leave.. which is mondae n tuesdae.. 2 unpacked all my stuffs.. yes.. unpack unpack n unpack.. oh no.. where got enough time?? haiz.. it's not tat i dun hav annual leave... y cant i take?? last yr.. after i bcame a full-time staff in april.. they owe mi 5 daes leave.. n tis yr till end of e yr.. i got 7daes leave.. so in total i got 12 daes annual leave.. if i take 3.5daes.. i'm onli clearin my last yr leave..
if i dun take it tis time round.. guess i dun hav a chance 2 le ba.. tink prob, my manager will take in june 4 a holidae.. n my god-sis will take leave in aug n dec definitely.. n my fren, anna, she will take leave durin lunar 9th month 4 at least 3 weeks.. till she even use no pay leave.. halo.. pple take leave take till no pay leave oso can.. y cant i ?? do i hav 2 wait till i worked till 10yrs later then i can clear my leave at once.. every yr our leave accumulate 4 1 more dae.. in other words, 1st yr is 7 daes.. 2nd yr is 8daes .. then on e 8th yr u will hav 14th daes.. then 9th yr onwards, it will b 14daes every yr.. so after 10yrs.. i will hav 117daes leave.. so in other words, i can take 3months ++ leave rite??
it realli makes my blood boils talkin abt tis.. anw... e next time u will c mi updatin.. tink it will b 2weeks later ba.. cos hav 2 install e scv cable point at my new place 1st.. 2dae not gonna b a restin dae 4 mi.. i gtg le.. hav 2 go my new place n do sum cleanin up 1st.. take care guys~
i'm runnin away.. yes.. i'm runnin away from u.. no actuall lahz.. i'm jus shiftin hm le.. when i was young.. i'm stayin at bukit batok.. jus opp stephanie's place.. under my block there's a police post.. at e age of 5 (yr 1993).. i moved 2 clementi.. my current venue.. under my block, there's oso a police post.. in e yr 1998.. which is after 5 yrs, my dad sold e clementi flat 2 my uncle.. but we been stayin here till now.. cos he is alwaz overseas workin.. therefore.. we didnt move out.. plus last time my dad's workplace is near my hse.. n mi n my didi is schooling here..
now.. pple is back.. we jus hav 2 move out no matter wat.. i hav been stayin near 4 13yrs.. but.. i still e flat in bukit batok.. e livin rm damn big.. though now i movin in2 a 4-rm flat as well.. but e livin rm seems smaller than e 4-rm flat in bukit batok.. mayb when i'm young, things look bigger.. lolx(=.=!!).. tml.. yes tml.. which is e 13th of may.. i movin 2 yishun le.. is our flat bought 8yrs again.. but i hav nv stayed in there b4.. n under e block dun hav police post oso.. feel so weird.. haiz.. plus.. from yishun mrt station.. i hav 2 walk hm.. yes.. walk hm.. summore it takes mi abt 10mins lohz.. oh gosh.. i jus cant imagine when i'm so tired.. i still hav 2 walk..
mom is a bit worried 4 mi.. cos when i go 4 soka activties.. none of centres r near my place.. in other words.. i'll b returnin hm late after meeting.. she worried tat i hav 2 walk hm alone.. quite quiet.. but got coffeeshops.. i'm jus afraid 2 meet drunk drinkers onli.. alamak.. if i noe i'm goin hm late.. i wun dare 2 wear skirts tat dae.. lolx.. a bit worried.. everything gonna b a mess 4 mi.. haiz(@.@)..
actuall my intent is 2 take 3.5 daes leave.. startin from tml half dae 2 next wed.. but my idiotic manager dare not approve my leave.. cos he sae it's too mani daes.. so he went 2 speak 2 my director.. even uncle jonathan ( my director) oso sidin him.. haiz.. no choice lohz.. i'm FORCED.. i repeat.. FORCED 2 cut down e no of daes of my leave.. in e end.. i decided 2 work tml.. n take 1 hr time off.. n take 2 daes leave.. which is mondae n tuesdae.. 2 unpacked all my stuffs.. yes.. unpack unpack n unpack.. oh no.. where got enough time?? haiz.. it's not tat i dun hav annual leave... y cant i take?? last yr.. after i bcame a full-time staff in april.. they owe mi 5 daes leave.. n tis yr till end of e yr.. i got 7daes leave.. so in total i got 12 daes annual leave.. if i take 3.5daes.. i'm onli clearin my last yr leave..
if i dun take it tis time round.. guess i dun hav a chance 2 le ba.. tink prob, my manager will take in june 4 a holidae.. n my god-sis will take leave in aug n dec definitely.. n my fren, anna, she will take leave durin lunar 9th month 4 at least 3 weeks.. till she even use no pay leave.. halo.. pple take leave take till no pay leave oso can.. y cant i ?? do i hav 2 wait till i worked till 10yrs later then i can clear my leave at once.. every yr our leave accumulate 4 1 more dae.. in other words, 1st yr is 7 daes.. 2nd yr is 8daes .. then on e 8th yr u will hav 14th daes.. then 9th yr onwards, it will b 14daes every yr.. so after 10yrs.. i will hav 117daes leave.. so in other words, i can take 3months ++ leave rite??
it realli makes my blood boils talkin abt tis.. anw... e next time u will c mi updatin.. tink it will b 2weeks later ba.. cos hav 2 install e scv cable point at my new place 1st.. 2dae not gonna b a restin dae 4 mi.. i gtg le.. hav 2 go my new place n do sum cleanin up 1st.. take care guys~
Friday, May 05, 2006
[ i'm stuck at home wif u ]
[ i'm stuck at home wif u ]
oh no.. i'm stuck at hm wif u.. not wif sum1.. but wif e flu i got.. i jus cant go anywhere.. cos i'm havin mc.. n tat i'm takin medication.. i jus cant get out of bed.. e medi jus make mi drowzy ar.. haiyo.. wat 2 do.. stay hm lohz..hmmm.. actuall.. i went 2 c e doc on wed.. after workin abt 2hrs.. i jus cant stand it anymore.. so i went 2 c my company doc.. i tot he wun give mi mc.. but he did.. so i headed back hm 2 rest lohz.. i hav 2 call back office 2 tell tat bloody manager.. but.. he isnt ard.. so tat freakin kampong mei pick up e call.. n give tat kinda of xialan attitude.. wat u did 2dae, u will bear e consequence.. ni hui chi kui de.. wait n c ba guys.. u will die a natural death..
but.. after e medication given by my company doc, my flu doesnt seems 2 improved a lot.. so yesterdae, i went 2 e poly clinic again.. oh gosh.. i jus hate poly clinic doc.. but my dad ask mi go there c.. at least is gov doc.. they will hav nth 2 sae.. hahaz.. but guess wat.. e doc so nice.. he gave mi 2 more daes mc.. so i'm oso hm 2dae.. tml havin voting 4 election.. so dun hav 2 work oso lahz.. heez.. so tis whole wk.. i onli work 1 dae.. plus another 2hrs++.. heez... realli like holidae.. but i goin 2 rot le lahz.. cant meet yun oso.. cos i havin flu ma.. then she busi workin after finish busyin wif her cousin's weddin.. hmmm.. u realli tired rite, yun??
i jus spend 3 daes.. slpin slpin n still slpin.. cos of e medication.. it isnt my fault actuall.. so dun blame mi 4 not bloggin yun.. haiz.. i jus tired.. i jus wanna get back 2 sch.. i wanna hav a taste of havin unfinished hmwk.. haiz.. how i wish.. i movin hse le.. will b quite busi actuall.. but guess next 2 weeks i hav lesser time 2 blog.. sorrie 4 frenz.. my hm add n hm no will change.. but hp no n e-mail add wont change.. so u guys still can contact mi thru my hp n e-mail add.. dun worry.. heez.. will get back 2 u guys soon after i move hse de.. (>.<).. i'm jus tired.. when can get a chance 2 lean on ur shoulders?? when can i tok 2 u freely?? when can my dreamz b fulfilled?? i'm jus tired of tinkin these questions.. i jus wan a simple life.. jian dan jiu shi mei...
oh no.. i'm stuck at hm wif u.. not wif sum1.. but wif e flu i got.. i jus cant go anywhere.. cos i'm havin mc.. n tat i'm takin medication.. i jus cant get out of bed.. e medi jus make mi drowzy ar.. haiyo.. wat 2 do.. stay hm lohz..hmmm.. actuall.. i went 2 c e doc on wed.. after workin abt 2hrs.. i jus cant stand it anymore.. so i went 2 c my company doc.. i tot he wun give mi mc.. but he did.. so i headed back hm 2 rest lohz.. i hav 2 call back office 2 tell tat bloody manager.. but.. he isnt ard.. so tat freakin kampong mei pick up e call.. n give tat kinda of xialan attitude.. wat u did 2dae, u will bear e consequence.. ni hui chi kui de.. wait n c ba guys.. u will die a natural death..
but.. after e medication given by my company doc, my flu doesnt seems 2 improved a lot.. so yesterdae, i went 2 e poly clinic again.. oh gosh.. i jus hate poly clinic doc.. but my dad ask mi go there c.. at least is gov doc.. they will hav nth 2 sae.. hahaz.. but guess wat.. e doc so nice.. he gave mi 2 more daes mc.. so i'm oso hm 2dae.. tml havin voting 4 election.. so dun hav 2 work oso lahz.. heez.. so tis whole wk.. i onli work 1 dae.. plus another 2hrs++.. heez... realli like holidae.. but i goin 2 rot le lahz.. cant meet yun oso.. cos i havin flu ma.. then she busi workin after finish busyin wif her cousin's weddin.. hmmm.. u realli tired rite, yun??
i jus spend 3 daes.. slpin slpin n still slpin.. cos of e medication.. it isnt my fault actuall.. so dun blame mi 4 not bloggin yun.. haiz.. i jus tired.. i jus wanna get back 2 sch.. i wanna hav a taste of havin unfinished hmwk.. haiz.. how i wish.. i movin hse le.. will b quite busi actuall.. but guess next 2 weeks i hav lesser time 2 blog.. sorrie 4 frenz.. my hm add n hm no will change.. but hp no n e-mail add wont change.. so u guys still can contact mi thru my hp n e-mail add.. dun worry.. heez.. will get back 2 u guys soon after i move hse de.. (>.<).. i'm jus tired.. when can get a chance 2 lean on ur shoulders?? when can i tok 2 u freely?? when can my dreamz b fulfilled?? i'm jus tired of tinkin these questions.. i jus wan a simple life.. jian dan jiu shi mei...
Monday, May 01, 2006
[ alignment tool(s) 21st anniversary dinner ]
[ alignment tool(s) 21st anniversary dinner ]
2dae is 1st of may... but plz allow mi 2 tok abt yester's big event 1st..
2dae is 1st of may... but plz allow mi 2 tok abt yester's big event 1st..
- 30th april
yester is my company 21st anniversary dinner & dance.. hmm.. 2 mani.. is a veri big event.. but 2 mi.. it's nothin much lahz.. so.. i nv realli cares lahz.. jus bought a little jacket n a handbag.. e dress n heels is old de.. but hardly wear lahz.. nv realli go make-up.. jus put mascara n lip stick lohz.. hair oso nv style lahz.. so troublesome n waste money.. went 2 meet yun at tiong.. n saw jacqueline at tiong mac.. n hav our lunch settled at e food court there.. yun ate chicken rice n i ate pig stomach soup.. wah diaoz.. e ajinomoto realli a lot ar.. make so thirsty.. instead of gettin a drink.. we had ice-cream.. 3 flavours comprising of yogurt,chocolate n cookies n cream.. yum yum.. so long nv hav ice-cream le.. cos so called havin diet lahz.. cos i scare i cannot fit in2 e dress lahz.. lolx(=.=!!).. went 2 search 4 a block 2 do my manicure lohz.. yun volunteer 2 do it 4 mi de.. lolx.. oh gosh.. guess wat.. e mosquito there simply lurve us too much.. they jus keep kissin us.. oh gosh..
due 2 my work, i hav 2 get in contact wif chemical every single dae.. n tis makes my hands n my nails realli weak.. e skin jus peels off easily.. while buffin my nails, e skin tears, n blood came gashin out.. i tink it realli scares ah yun.. lolx.. it's pretti okie lahz.. jus not in e best or shld sae ideal place 4 manicure.. but still wanna thankie u ah yun.. thankie 4 helpin mi do manicure.. lolx.. after we had everythingy done, we headed back 2 tiong at buy bubble tea at tiong sweettalk.. wat e hell.. e girl serving us is jus too freakin rude.. cant stand tis kinda of pple.. service line.. i repeat it's service line lehz.. wif such attitude.. how 2 work in service line.. hmmmm... calm down!!!!
after which, we sat at e umbrella table outside old chang kee.. we chat till around 5pm b4 i send yun 2 take bus at e opp bus-stop.. her bus came quite fast.. after she boarded e bus, i crossed e rd 2 take bus16 2 orchard.. e bus is jus realli slow.. bcos of tat, i saw 2 person i hasnt seen 4 long.. it's huiqing n tiensoon.. but luckily they didnt c mi.. not bcos i'm in a sorrie state.. but jus tat i jus dunoe how 2 react if they realli c mi.. i'm oso afraid tat huiqing will diao mi.. jus dunoe how is he living now.. as 4 tiensoon, still as xia lan lahz.. jus bwg abt him..
i'm slightly late.. cos of e bus lahz.. my dinner is held at chengdu restuarant in hotel grand central (it's jus behind meredien hotel).. all e 4 qc gers r arranged 2 b e recieptists.. sound so funny.. y not e admin gers?? bcos they dun look presentable?? lolx.. hahaz.. my leader.. as usual lahz.. my manager drove her there.. tat kampong ger.. veri shan ding de.. country bumpkin type.. even specialist shoppin centre oso dunoe.. hopeless.. aiyoz.. y?? y tong ren bu tong ming?? i jus cant stand her.. my pinky dress is bought last yr.. but i onli wear twice.. it costs mi 50over bucks.. i bought a pink little jacket too.. 4 14bucks at far east.. a pair of heels bought at bata.. n a handbag from og.. but guess wat.. my leader bought her clothes at this fashion.. alamak!!! so cheap.. summore xue pple wear low cut blouse.. oso dunoe wat she wanna show.. yuck!!!
did quite a no of thingy.. run here n there n carry this carry tat.. finall.. i can get back 2 do recieptist.. oh no.. i jus cant stand her poor english.. english worse than mine.. my parents were late.. cos my mom hav 2 rush hm 2 pom pom from work n rush cab down.. e 1st thingy my mom saw my leader.. she sae.. alamak.. wear till so ugly.. so low class.. lolx.. though she got style her hair, she got make-up.. but e feedback abt her is jus bad.. oops.. my boss kept teasin mi in front of my parents.. sae i look great in my wearin.. olx.. it's jus simply 2 mi lahz.. our host 4 2dae is MC King.. he's realli cute.. lolx(>.<).. it's realli filled wif excitement.. my dad win a total of 250bucks voucher 4 bein e male champion 4 e best dress contest.. lolx.. gana sabotage oso can win.. lolx.. e food.. i dun realli like it lahz..
i jus dun hav e appetite 2 eat.. mayb bcos e muslim table r opp ours.. n tat kannan kept lookin over.. i hav a rumour wif him.. i jus dunoe who e hell create it.. if is my kor.. i sure chop him off.. lolx.. e whole dinner is filled wif laughter.. i enjoyed it a lot.. but i didnt take pics.. even wif da jie n kor..haiz.. wat a pity.. 1st prize is lcd tv.. guess who won it? not 8838 (my lucky draw no).. is 8828..it's jenny.. from admin.. hmmm.. an enjoyable but tirin dae..
- 1st may
hmmm.. after cumin hm late yester.. 2dae.. i suppose it's a holidae.. it's holidae.. shld relax.. actuall wanna go kbox de.. but au ben dan.. call him he not hm.. end up.. i caught a flu so is yun.. so we stayed hm.. i movin hse liao le ma.. so i'm hm packin all my stuff.. pack pack n pack.. after everythingy is shifted 2 my new flat.. is unpack, unpacked n unpacked.. oh gosh.. sick man.. so ma fan.. but i gonna hav my own room.. yeah!!!!~ my own space.. lookin 4ward 2 tat.. yes!!!!
Saturday, April 22, 2006
[ let mi go 2 rest ]
[ let mi go 2 rest ]
haiz.. it's 11 plus liao.. yet i still awake n still blogging.. lolx(>.<).. was out wif zhongteck, ziyuan, kenneth, weidong n yun jus now.. went 2 view e npcc dae parade at e hq 2dae.. it's at e new campus.. at chua chu kang.. hmmm.. we took e chartered bus at cck interchange.. ah yun 4gotten tat's a chartered bus so she went 2 tap her ez-link.. lolx.. so funny.. make much much nicer n bigger than e old one.. n definitely dun look as scary.. lolx.. heez.. realli mizzes ms liang alot.. saw lian kiat, weiqi they all.. liankiat.. tis name sound familiar rite?? hahaz.. he's our squadmate.. okie.. i repeat.. he belongs 2 nco warriors 03'04.. not 04'05 de okie.. yet.. he joined them.. mayb i jus dun gd bein wif them.. i mean nco from 04'05 lahz..
i sae sumthingy veri bad 2dae.. i sae abt e nco from 04'05.. summore use weidong's squad 2 describe them.. weidong mus b veri angry wif mi.. haiz.. sorrie weidong.. i noe i'm haste in my words.. didnt get 2 c ms liang.. cos it's jus too crowded.. 10th gold award.. will there still b e 11th one?? (>.<).. saw haven been eatin anythingy since mornin.. so damn hungry.. yet tat stupid bdae boi ong zhong teck wanna go till bugis n eat.. sae wanna watch soccer.. oh gosh.. end up.. after much arguement.. they decided 2 eat at clementi.. n oh cos at coffee shop cos they wanna watch soccer lohz.. haiz.. soccer nice mehz? kick here kick there still a ball.. lolx.. e coffeeshop near 7-eleven.. aiyoz.. so mani old man.. all look like lecher.. lolx.. jus make mi feel like i'm in geylang.. lolx.. end up.. mi n yun decided 2 go 2 mac 4 dinner.. n dunoe y.. weidong n kenneth decided 2 tag along.. but tat stupid kenneth... i go buy food then he left 4 hm liao le.. haiz..
ah yun ate nugget meal n i ate macspicy meal.. lolx.. n i love mayo a lot.. guess wat.. wei dong ate e same thingyas well.. oh gosh~ he sae.. "oh no.. i got e same taste as u".... lolx(>.<).. shockingly.. alwaz sae my taste veri poor.. lolx(=.=).. sum pple's taste is jus as poor.. ho ho ho (#.#).. saw rainbow 2dae oso.. i almost 4gotten.. kekez.. mayb bcos now adays keep rainin ba.. rain.. plz take away my worries wif u.... at mac.. we tok abt mani of e past np stuff.. n realli awaken lotsa of saddenin moments as well as angry moments.. n of cos.. sum sickenin pple who left our lives wif scars n make our lives inprefect.. but i'm sure.. those scars realli make us learned n grew from it..
but these sickenin pple out there.. r u awaken 2 ur own mistakes?? bu yao yi cuo zai cuo le, ni hui yue xian yue shen de.. dao shi huo, jiu hui yi fa bu ke shou shi.. on our way back, i mean mi, ah yun n au ben dan.. we were waitin 4 bus at clementi interchange.. then got 3 foreign workers kept starin n walkin pass mi n ah yun.. hahaz.. guess wat.. au ben dan stands closer 2 us.. heez.. end up.. their bus cum le.. leavin mi alone waitin 4 bus 282.. oh gosh.. guess wat.. e 3 men boarded e same bus as mi.. n they jus sit opp mi.. n kept starin at mi.. if not of weidong's reaction, i wun b so terrified.. alamak.. luckily, my mom n didi jus return from outside.. so i called them 2 pick mi up at e bus stop.. after tis incident.. guess i'll try 2 return hm earlier..
haiz.. it's 11 plus liao.. yet i still awake n still blogging.. lolx(>.<).. was out wif zhongteck, ziyuan, kenneth, weidong n yun jus now.. went 2 view e npcc dae parade at e hq 2dae.. it's at e new campus.. at chua chu kang.. hmmm.. we took e chartered bus at cck interchange.. ah yun 4gotten tat's a chartered bus so she went 2 tap her ez-link.. lolx.. so funny.. make much much nicer n bigger than e old one.. n definitely dun look as scary.. lolx.. heez.. realli mizzes ms liang alot.. saw lian kiat, weiqi they all.. liankiat.. tis name sound familiar rite?? hahaz.. he's our squadmate.. okie.. i repeat.. he belongs 2 nco warriors 03'04.. not 04'05 de okie.. yet.. he joined them.. mayb i jus dun gd bein wif them.. i mean nco from 04'05 lahz..
i sae sumthingy veri bad 2dae.. i sae abt e nco from 04'05.. summore use weidong's squad 2 describe them.. weidong mus b veri angry wif mi.. haiz.. sorrie weidong.. i noe i'm haste in my words.. didnt get 2 c ms liang.. cos it's jus too crowded.. 10th gold award.. will there still b e 11th one?? (>.<).. saw haven been eatin anythingy since mornin.. so damn hungry.. yet tat stupid bdae boi ong zhong teck wanna go till bugis n eat.. sae wanna watch soccer.. oh gosh.. end up.. after much arguement.. they decided 2 eat at clementi.. n oh cos at coffee shop cos they wanna watch soccer lohz.. haiz.. soccer nice mehz? kick here kick there still a ball.. lolx.. e coffeeshop near 7-eleven.. aiyoz.. so mani old man.. all look like lecher.. lolx.. jus make mi feel like i'm in geylang.. lolx.. end up.. mi n yun decided 2 go 2 mac 4 dinner.. n dunoe y.. weidong n kenneth decided 2 tag along.. but tat stupid kenneth... i go buy food then he left 4 hm liao le.. haiz..
ah yun ate nugget meal n i ate macspicy meal.. lolx.. n i love mayo a lot.. guess wat.. wei dong ate e same thingyas well.. oh gosh~ he sae.. "oh no.. i got e same taste as u".... lolx(>.<).. shockingly.. alwaz sae my taste veri poor.. lolx(=.=).. sum pple's taste is jus as poor.. ho ho ho (#.#).. saw rainbow 2dae oso.. i almost 4gotten.. kekez.. mayb bcos now adays keep rainin ba.. rain.. plz take away my worries wif u.... at mac.. we tok abt mani of e past np stuff.. n realli awaken lotsa of saddenin moments as well as angry moments.. n of cos.. sum sickenin pple who left our lives wif scars n make our lives inprefect.. but i'm sure.. those scars realli make us learned n grew from it..
but these sickenin pple out there.. r u awaken 2 ur own mistakes?? bu yao yi cuo zai cuo le, ni hui yue xian yue shen de.. dao shi huo, jiu hui yi fa bu ke shou shi.. on our way back, i mean mi, ah yun n au ben dan.. we were waitin 4 bus at clementi interchange.. then got 3 foreign workers kept starin n walkin pass mi n ah yun.. hahaz.. guess wat.. au ben dan stands closer 2 us.. heez.. end up.. their bus cum le.. leavin mi alone waitin 4 bus 282.. oh gosh.. guess wat.. e 3 men boarded e same bus as mi.. n they jus sit opp mi.. n kept starin at mi.. if not of weidong's reaction, i wun b so terrified.. alamak.. luckily, my mom n didi jus return from outside.. so i called them 2 pick mi up at e bus stop.. after tis incident.. guess i'll try 2 return hm earlier..
Sunday, April 16, 2006
[[ x zao ji zhe ni ........ zao ji zhe shi ji mei you ni x ]]
[ zao ji zhe ni... zao ji zhe shi ji mei you ni ]
haiz.. 2dae.. i actuall set my alarm clock 2 wakey at 10am tis mornin.. n guess wat.. i woke up at 8++.. haiz.. n then i went 4 breakfast wif my dad,mom n didi at e usual coffeeshop we alwaz visit on sundae mornin.. i had a bowl of fish porriage n a cup of hot milo.. cos mom sae early mornin cannot drink cold drinks.. i added egg 4 e porriage n guess wat.. it's so raw though i kept covering e egg wif e warm porriage.. *yuck* .. got e raw raw smell veri disgusting..
walkin around wif my dolly hairstyle.. feel so weird.. heez.. but.. it's a gd change ma.. at least i look younger.. after which, i met catherine at clementi n had our lunch at mac.. hmmm.. after which we went 2 shop 4 mascara at watson.. then we headed 2 tampines by mrt.. got 2 hear 2 veri touching testi from 2 of our soka mbers.. realli veri touching.. i even drop tears.. every time i hear testi from our soka mbers, i will feel tat actuall my life isnt as bad actuall lahz.. so thru hearin testi from them, it will realli encourages mi a lot.. it will encourage mi 2 move on..
on our way, catherine vomitted on e mrt.. oh gosh!! scare mi.. mayb bcos too mani pple liao then veri stuffy lohz.. haiz.. i met yun at tiong.. then she went shoppin 4 clothes.. haiz.. how i wish i can new clothes too.. but.. my mom restricts mi from buyin.. cos i realli got too mani clothes in my wardrode liao le.. summmore sum nv even wear b4 de.. saw sum realli nice ladies' slippers.. realli feel like buyin.. but slippers n shoes oso a lot.. so dare not buy scare mom scold.. lolx.. heez.. cos i movin hse soon liao le.. if got mani stuff.. then will hav sum probz.. though i gonna hav my own room soon.. heez.. but stay in e west so long.. all a sudden movin 2 north side.. feelin a bit uneasy.. i still love my old hse at bukit batok.. though i onli stay there 5 yrs..
but majority of my frenz stay in west n south.. my soka activities r oso in e west.. haiz.. realli veri tired ar.. realli.. i wanna go on holidae!!! i wanna travel!!!
haiz.. 2dae.. i actuall set my alarm clock 2 wakey at 10am tis mornin.. n guess wat.. i woke up at 8++.. haiz.. n then i went 4 breakfast wif my dad,mom n didi at e usual coffeeshop we alwaz visit on sundae mornin.. i had a bowl of fish porriage n a cup of hot milo.. cos mom sae early mornin cannot drink cold drinks.. i added egg 4 e porriage n guess wat.. it's so raw though i kept covering e egg wif e warm porriage.. *yuck* .. got e raw raw smell veri disgusting..
walkin around wif my dolly hairstyle.. feel so weird.. heez.. but.. it's a gd change ma.. at least i look younger.. after which, i met catherine at clementi n had our lunch at mac.. hmmm.. after which we went 2 shop 4 mascara at watson.. then we headed 2 tampines by mrt.. got 2 hear 2 veri touching testi from 2 of our soka mbers.. realli veri touching.. i even drop tears.. every time i hear testi from our soka mbers, i will feel tat actuall my life isnt as bad actuall lahz.. so thru hearin testi from them, it will realli encourages mi a lot.. it will encourage mi 2 move on..
on our way, catherine vomitted on e mrt.. oh gosh!! scare mi.. mayb bcos too mani pple liao then veri stuffy lohz.. haiz.. i met yun at tiong.. then she went shoppin 4 clothes.. haiz.. how i wish i can new clothes too.. but.. my mom restricts mi from buyin.. cos i realli got too mani clothes in my wardrode liao le.. summmore sum nv even wear b4 de.. saw sum realli nice ladies' slippers.. realli feel like buyin.. but slippers n shoes oso a lot.. so dare not buy scare mom scold.. lolx.. heez.. cos i movin hse soon liao le.. if got mani stuff.. then will hav sum probz.. though i gonna hav my own room soon.. heez.. but stay in e west so long.. all a sudden movin 2 north side.. feelin a bit uneasy.. i still love my old hse at bukit batok.. though i onli stay there 5 yrs..
but majority of my frenz stay in west n south.. my soka activities r oso in e west.. haiz.. realli veri tired ar.. realli.. i wanna go on holidae!!! i wanna travel!!!
Saturday, April 15, 2006
i jus fulfill one of my wishes!!!!
[ i jus fulfill one of my wishes!!!! ]
heez.. guess y i am online at tis hr?? coz i jus came hm from hougang.. heez.. wat am i doin there?? mi n yun went 2 one of e salon there.. actuall.. my job 2dae is 2 fulfill her wish of doin rebonding lahz.. so i brought there 2 search 4 salons lohz.. end up.. we actuall went back 2 e same salon where i did my ice rebondin abt 1 1/2 yr ago.. lolx.. lolx.. c my nick u mus tink i go do rebonding again.. but.. no lahz.. i didnt.. coz my mom lohz.. she dun wanna give mi money do.. she sae will spoil my hair texture then e chemical oso not gd 4 my hair.. i nv do perming oso lahz.. coz my mom sae too chao lao liao.. rebonding alread makes much more matured than b4.. so nv intend 2 turn older.. lolx.. summore.. i scare.. scare it dun suits mi well..
now.. my whole hair is clean clean n filled wif a bit of salon smell.. coz i hav alread been stuck there from 3++ till 7++.. lolx.. coz yun do shiseido rebonding ma.. heez.. but rebonding indeed makes her look more presentable.. lolx.. she goin 2 chop mi when she reads my entry.. lolx.. heez(=.=!!).. lolx.. wat i hav done wif my hair?? i jus fulfill e 1st dream listed on my wishlist.. n tat's a new hairstyle.. yeah!!!! plz look below..
tat's how my hair looks like durin my sec 4 life b4 i do my rebonding
tat's how my hair looks like in feb durin chinese new yr
tat's how my hair looks like in april at melvin's bdae celebration
tat's how my hair looks like now......... (=.=!!)
big big changes after 2 yrs rite?? lolx.. mus tu po ma.. heez.. anw.. i'm realli satisfied wif my hairstyle now.. a new hairstyle.. a new start.. heez.. gambatie..
heez.. guess y i am online at tis hr?? coz i jus came hm from hougang.. heez.. wat am i doin there?? mi n yun went 2 one of e salon there.. actuall.. my job 2dae is 2 fulfill her wish of doin rebonding lahz.. so i brought there 2 search 4 salons lohz.. end up.. we actuall went back 2 e same salon where i did my ice rebondin abt 1 1/2 yr ago.. lolx.. lolx.. c my nick u mus tink i go do rebonding again.. but.. no lahz.. i didnt.. coz my mom lohz.. she dun wanna give mi money do.. she sae will spoil my hair texture then e chemical oso not gd 4 my hair.. i nv do perming oso lahz.. coz my mom sae too chao lao liao.. rebonding alread makes much more matured than b4.. so nv intend 2 turn older.. lolx.. summore.. i scare.. scare it dun suits mi well..
now.. my whole hair is clean clean n filled wif a bit of salon smell.. coz i hav alread been stuck there from 3++ till 7++.. lolx.. coz yun do shiseido rebonding ma.. heez.. but rebonding indeed makes her look more presentable.. lolx.. she goin 2 chop mi when she reads my entry.. lolx.. heez(=.=!!).. lolx.. wat i hav done wif my hair?? i jus fulfill e 1st dream listed on my wishlist.. n tat's a new hairstyle.. yeah!!!! plz look below..
tat's how my hair looks like durin my sec 4 life b4 i do my rebonding
tat's how my hair looks like in feb durin chinese new yr
tat's how my hair looks like in april at melvin's bdae celebration
tat's how my hair looks like now......... (=.=!!)
big big changes after 2 yrs rite?? lolx.. mus tu po ma.. heez.. anw.. i'm realli satisfied wif my hairstyle now.. a new hairstyle.. a new start.. heez.. gambatie..
Thursday, April 13, 2006
dai zui gao yang
[ dai zui gao yang ]
few daes again.. i jus met a veri frustrating incident.. tat's was on tuesdae,11th of april.. haiz.. as usual.. i'm alwaz veri busi at work.. in order nt 2 delay my work.. i skipped e tea break at 10am.. yet, my leader, xiao jun, my da jie,xiu juan n my fren anna still continue 2 go 4 their tea break.. due 2 shortage of tubes 4 our cutters, one of e sales-person actuall mentioned tis probz durin our company daily production meetin.. due 2 tat probz bein mentioned, actions had 2 b carried out 2 get tis probz solve 4 e moment.. e admin manager who is oso in charge of e purchasing of tubes actuall went 2 e store where our cutters r kept as stock 2 search 4 old tubes.. truely, they found quite a no of tubes..
e admin manager is frustrated bein e complain lodged.. she atuall went 2 question my 3 seniors.. n guess wat.. my leader sae tat she actuall instructed mi 2 go 2 e store 2 search 4 it but i told her i cannot find.. oh wat e ... tat's e frustrating part.. she didnt even instruct mi 2 search 4 e tubes 4 e cutters left on e shelf in qc.. wat e hell!! how can she push e blame 2 mi?? how can?? as a senior, as a leader, how can do such a thingy 2 her junior?? HOW CAN?? i realli feel saddenin workin in tis department.. my da jie n anna actuall suggest mi 2 go tell e admin manager e truth.. but i noe.. there's no point sayin anythingy more.. my manager will protect my leader de..
every single dae.. u will jus c her doin thingy so slowly tat u feel like choppin off her hands.. n u c n hear e way she tok.. u will jus feel like slappin her stinky mouth.. n u c e way she pretend doing thingy.. in other words, *k-eng*(hokkien).. u jus feel like ... argh~ she's e one alwaz pretendin tis pretendin tat.. yet.. my manager nv sae anythingy.. n summore sae i'm e one pretendin.. wat e hell!! when other pple rushing 4 shipment n e needs e profile projector (machine used 2 check cutters), she will alwaz fight 2 use it.. n when pple rushin 2 type e report, she will b typin her report, takin her own sweet time at e computer..
n when she finishes her stuff 4 shipment or e m'sia cutters dun hav 2 send 4 shipment, she will still continue 2 check her own cutters n will nv volunteer 2 help out wif e shipment.. n even when she rushin 4 shipment, when her fone rings, she will still pick up n takes at least 5 mins outside e rm tokin.. everytime is her bf.. everythingy oso her bf.. alwaz tell pple my bf tis my bf tat.. got bf big deal ar?? u hav, other pple oso hav ar.. wat's e big deal?? i dun c any.. y?? tong ren bu tong ming ar.. bcos of tat, i jus bcum pple's dai zui gao yang..
few daes again.. i jus met a veri frustrating incident.. tat's was on tuesdae,11th of april.. haiz.. as usual.. i'm alwaz veri busi at work.. in order nt 2 delay my work.. i skipped e tea break at 10am.. yet, my leader, xiao jun, my da jie,xiu juan n my fren anna still continue 2 go 4 their tea break.. due 2 shortage of tubes 4 our cutters, one of e sales-person actuall mentioned tis probz durin our company daily production meetin.. due 2 tat probz bein mentioned, actions had 2 b carried out 2 get tis probz solve 4 e moment.. e admin manager who is oso in charge of e purchasing of tubes actuall went 2 e store where our cutters r kept as stock 2 search 4 old tubes.. truely, they found quite a no of tubes..
e admin manager is frustrated bein e complain lodged.. she atuall went 2 question my 3 seniors.. n guess wat.. my leader sae tat she actuall instructed mi 2 go 2 e store 2 search 4 it but i told her i cannot find.. oh wat e ... tat's e frustrating part.. she didnt even instruct mi 2 search 4 e tubes 4 e cutters left on e shelf in qc.. wat e hell!! how can she push e blame 2 mi?? how can?? as a senior, as a leader, how can do such a thingy 2 her junior?? HOW CAN?? i realli feel saddenin workin in tis department.. my da jie n anna actuall suggest mi 2 go tell e admin manager e truth.. but i noe.. there's no point sayin anythingy more.. my manager will protect my leader de..
every single dae.. u will jus c her doin thingy so slowly tat u feel like choppin off her hands.. n u c n hear e way she tok.. u will jus feel like slappin her stinky mouth.. n u c e way she pretend doing thingy.. in other words, *k-eng*(hokkien).. u jus feel like ... argh~ she's e one alwaz pretendin tis pretendin tat.. yet.. my manager nv sae anythingy.. n summore sae i'm e one pretendin.. wat e hell!! when other pple rushing 4 shipment n e needs e profile projector (machine used 2 check cutters), she will alwaz fight 2 use it.. n when pple rushin 2 type e report, she will b typin her report, takin her own sweet time at e computer..
n when she finishes her stuff 4 shipment or e m'sia cutters dun hav 2 send 4 shipment, she will still continue 2 check her own cutters n will nv volunteer 2 help out wif e shipment.. n even when she rushin 4 shipment, when her fone rings, she will still pick up n takes at least 5 mins outside e rm tokin.. everytime is her bf.. everythingy oso her bf.. alwaz tell pple my bf tis my bf tat.. got bf big deal ar?? u hav, other pple oso hav ar.. wat's e big deal?? i dun c any.. y?? tong ren bu tong ming ar.. bcos of tat, i jus bcum pple's dai zui gao yang..
Sunday, April 09, 2006
addicted
[ addicted ]
hmmm.. i hav been searchin 4 tis song 4 veri long.. hopin 2 change my blog music.. 4 frenz who mizz it.. yester e song i input is SHE's bu xiang zhang da.. but 2dae.. dunoe y.. i jus feel like findin e song tat can describe my feelin now.. hmmm.. tink less than 2 mths again.. i once told a fren who told mi tat he hope tat he can find his happiness soon.. then i oso dunoe y.. i feel tat he will meet his ms rite soon.. so i told him.. it's cumin soon liao le.. n tell him not 2 worry.. now.. guess wat.. he told him he got a gf le.. n hav been datin 4 almost 1 mth liao le.. realli feels veri happi 4 him.. heez..
though i haven meet mine.. but i noe.. he's near.. is jus tat e time isnt rite.. therefore i still dunoe.. mayb he's sum1 i noe alread.. lolx.. like fa hua chi like tat.. but havin sum1 u love bein there 4 all e time is realli a great thingy.. i'm sure i'll b filled wif happiness de.. WO SHI XING FU DE.. tat's wat i believe.. yester.. i'm on e fone wif one of my jie, catherine.. we tok realli a lot.. rangin from her bf 2 my ex.. i realli envy catherine n stephanie.. both of them realli fortunate hav such great bfs.. haiz.. sumtimes.. goin out wif them i oso feel paiseh.. cos i like light bulb like tat.. then will feel bein neglected like tat.. haiz.. they oso kept pushin mi.. ask mi find sum1 dating.. but this kinda thingy how can force de?? lolx.. am i rite?
i realli cant rmb how izzit like 2 fall 4 sum1 deeply.. how long did ur longest crush last?? mine was 4 yrs.. tat was durin my pri sch daes.. lolx.. on a veri nice guy.. he oso veri rich.. he's tat type veri gentlemen type.. less than 2 mths time.. i met him on e bus.. lolx.. tat was e 1st time i seen him after we graduated from pri. sch.. he still look e same.. so handsome.. mi n him quite fated.. after pri.2 we changed sch cos our sch demolished.. then we ended in e same class n e same class summore.. after streamin in pri.4 we went in2 diff class.. he veri clever so he went 2 best em2 class.. after then.. our frenship slowly turns pale.. but i still rmb him as my best bud.. after which 2nd crush last abt 3 yrs.. lolx.. so long.. i still rmb one of my fren's cousin has a crush on a ger 4 seven yrs.. wow.. tat's long.. longer than a relationship..
crush usuall last longer than a relationship.. my longest relationship onli last 1 yr plus.. yet my longest crush was 4 yrs.. tat was when i was veri naive lahz.. hahaz.. anw.. lovin sum1 is nv easy.. findin sum1 u love is nv easy too.. so couples out there.. mus cherish ur partner worz.. n nv take them 4 granted.. cos everythingy dun comes as u wan........
[ A d d i c t e d ] - simple plan
heard you're doing okay
But I want you to know
I'm a dick
I'm addicted to you
I can't pretend
I don't care
When you don't think about me
Do you think I deserve this?
I tried to make you happy but you left anyway
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker Heartbreaker Heartbreaker
Since the day I met you
And after all we've been through
I'm still a dick
I'm addicted to you
I think you know that it's true
I'd run a thousand miles to get you
Do you think I deserve this?
I tried to make you happy
I did all that
I could
Just to keep you
But you left anyway
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker Heartbreaker
How long will I be waiting?
Until the end of time
I don't know why I'm still waiting
I can't make you mine
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
[x2]
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
hmmm.. i hav been searchin 4 tis song 4 veri long.. hopin 2 change my blog music.. 4 frenz who mizz it.. yester e song i input is SHE's bu xiang zhang da.. but 2dae.. dunoe y.. i jus feel like findin e song tat can describe my feelin now.. hmmm.. tink less than 2 mths again.. i once told a fren who told mi tat he hope tat he can find his happiness soon.. then i oso dunoe y.. i feel tat he will meet his ms rite soon.. so i told him.. it's cumin soon liao le.. n tell him not 2 worry.. now.. guess wat.. he told him he got a gf le.. n hav been datin 4 almost 1 mth liao le.. realli feels veri happi 4 him.. heez..
though i haven meet mine.. but i noe.. he's near.. is jus tat e time isnt rite.. therefore i still dunoe.. mayb he's sum1 i noe alread.. lolx.. like fa hua chi like tat.. but havin sum1 u love bein there 4 all e time is realli a great thingy.. i'm sure i'll b filled wif happiness de.. WO SHI XING FU DE.. tat's wat i believe.. yester.. i'm on e fone wif one of my jie, catherine.. we tok realli a lot.. rangin from her bf 2 my ex.. i realli envy catherine n stephanie.. both of them realli fortunate hav such great bfs.. haiz.. sumtimes.. goin out wif them i oso feel paiseh.. cos i like light bulb like tat.. then will feel bein neglected like tat.. haiz.. they oso kept pushin mi.. ask mi find sum1 dating.. but this kinda thingy how can force de?? lolx.. am i rite?
i realli cant rmb how izzit like 2 fall 4 sum1 deeply.. how long did ur longest crush last?? mine was 4 yrs.. tat was durin my pri sch daes.. lolx.. on a veri nice guy.. he oso veri rich.. he's tat type veri gentlemen type.. less than 2 mths time.. i met him on e bus.. lolx.. tat was e 1st time i seen him after we graduated from pri. sch.. he still look e same.. so handsome.. mi n him quite fated.. after pri.2 we changed sch cos our sch demolished.. then we ended in e same class n e same class summore.. after streamin in pri.4 we went in2 diff class.. he veri clever so he went 2 best em2 class.. after then.. our frenship slowly turns pale.. but i still rmb him as my best bud.. after which 2nd crush last abt 3 yrs.. lolx.. so long.. i still rmb one of my fren's cousin has a crush on a ger 4 seven yrs.. wow.. tat's long.. longer than a relationship..
crush usuall last longer than a relationship.. my longest relationship onli last 1 yr plus.. yet my longest crush was 4 yrs.. tat was when i was veri naive lahz.. hahaz.. anw.. lovin sum1 is nv easy.. findin sum1 u love is nv easy too.. so couples out there.. mus cherish ur partner worz.. n nv take them 4 granted.. cos everythingy dun comes as u wan........
[ A d d i c t e d ] - simple plan
heard you're doing okay
But I want you to know
I'm a dick
I'm addicted to you
I can't pretend
I don't care
When you don't think about me
Do you think I deserve this?
I tried to make you happy but you left anyway
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker Heartbreaker Heartbreaker
Since the day I met you
And after all we've been through
I'm still a dick
I'm addicted to you
I think you know that it's true
I'd run a thousand miles to get you
Do you think I deserve this?
I tried to make you happy
I did all that
I could
Just to keep you
But you left anyway
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker Heartbreaker
How long will I be waiting?
Until the end of time
I don't know why I'm still waiting
I can't make you mine
I'm trying to forget that
I'm addicted to you
But I want it and I need it
I'm addicted to you
[x2]
Now it's over
Can't forget what you said
And I never wanna do this again
Heartbreaker
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
I'm addicted to you
Heartbreaker
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