[ 心情不好就勉强自己笑... ]

心情不好就勉强自己笑...

slept till almost 1pm today.. was really really TIRED... was awaken by Ben Ben's phone call.. hais.. still very frustrated by Mr "F".. i replied his sms yesterday.. and was FRANK enough to him.. instead of thinking through and accept me a friend.. he.. kept forcing me.. to give him a chance.. HAIS! can you just understand what i mean?? was telling Ben Ben how troubled i am now..

hais.. simply CANNOT smile at all.. maybe ben ben is right.. i should be FRANK and FIRM in my decision and not even worried losing a friend.. i just hope i wont see him recently.. didnt want to see him at all.. ate my lunch at about 2pm.. had mixed veggies rice and longan red-date drink.. home alone today.. wanted to SGH today actually.. but, because of MR "F" is having his attachment there.. so i decided not to go and stay home and rest.. BUT, if i go, i would save somebody's life.. hais! not enough the weather is BAD, my mood is BAD, even my appetite is BAD....

mood is BAD today.. everything seems to agitate me today very easily.. was talking to Joyce online.. just some plain catch up with her.. she's just being SWEET to find me out how am i doing.. thanks thanks! then chatted with Medy also.. he's back from Genting liao.. seen their pictures in facebook.. *sad sad*.. at least they spent their holidays on a holiday.. i spent my holidays at home, with cca and in SG!! also heard from Medy that Woanlan will be going back to KL on the 28th.. and Medy will be leaving for China on the 1st of july.. sianz diao.. but never mind, by then, my attachment also starting liao..

nothing much seems to happen today.. just that my mood is BAD.. BAD BAD BAD.... ARGHhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! saw Daryl's friendster.. and he wrote this: "no.1 cant give others a good life (YOU)... thats why i choose to break up..." hais! it makes my MOOD even SADDER when i see this.. i'm a *emo girl* TODAY!! i'm serious.. BUT, i must still thank Ben Ben.. for willingly to allow me to employ him FOC to cheer me up.. thanks for that best bud!

attended Ah peng's dad funeral wake just now.. the setting of the wake really awaken my memories of Ah ma and Lihua jie jie.. i just MISSES them SO MUCH.. my tears almost flow out when i was chanting.. well, i must admit.. i'm really EMOTIC today! after the prayer session, sat down with Xue Ling and chanted with her.. then hop on to sit with Chee Cheng they all.. well, Chee Cheng.. he will never fails to ENCOURAGE me! thanks BRO! thanks for all that you have done..

plans tomorrow
- Morning: to go down to SGH to donate blood for Kelly's dad / to attend Ah peng's dad wake (cremation)
- Afternoon: to go down to SK to do the calling
- Evening: to meet Stella (lala) for dinner at Toa Poyah


to Daryl: i know you have been blaming yourself that you cant give me a good life that's why you have chosen to break up with me after patching up last year.. well, what i can say is - it's FATE ba.. dont keep blaming yourself over what have happened. i wasnt firm as well.. when you voice out, i didnt even think but say yes.. maybe we didnt meant to be together at that moment ba...