[ 我要勇敢一点！i want to be more COURAGEOUS! ]

我要勇敢一点 i want to be more COURAGEOUS!

woke up at 11am TODAY! sleep AN HOUR lesser! it's AN ACHIEVEMENT! cause i am trying to cut my sleep lesser day by day.. slept this morning at 2am and wake up at 11am.. actually 9hours of sleep is normal for young adults like us.. just that i sleep late and wake up late.. that's why it seems like i have wasted HALF a DAY sleeping.. actually NOT TRUE at all.. just that my day ends later, so also start later.. if you realised, the day time has been LONGER nowadays and the night time SHORTER.. it is due to thinning of our atmosphere.. that's why when we sleep, we always find that very fast our alarm clock will ring and we have to get out of our lala land..

went to have brunch together with Mom and Didi.. we went to have mixed veggies rice at a nearby coffeeshop.. well, i LOSE my TEMPER again! cause the food i requested to eat, i didnt get to.. and Mom ordered all the food Didi wanted to.. so, i'm like so ANGRY! and at the same time, forcing myself to finish the rice.. after makan, we went to the bookshop to get the ink catridge for my printer.. then headed home.. reached home, i went to shower immediately.. the WEATHER is just simply TERRIBLE! then turn on my computer and printed some gakkai stuffs for meeting..

yesterday night, i actually replied Mr "F" sms after many days.. i told him that we are impossible and ask him not to force me.. after which, he didnt reply my sms.. i guess this is a GOOD SIGN? just hope so.. i'm so AFRAID of going to the kaikan now and knocking into him! if i really see him, should i say hi or just walk away pretending that i dont know him? guess i have LOST a FRIEND.. hais! went out at about 5pm.. took bus851 to Tiong Bahru.. on the way there, BESTIE sms me and told me that he have to submit some stuff back to school by today..

i guess he felt the stress that there's lots to do at work and have been given LAST MINUTE notification about the submittion of hardcopy of the declaration form.. if it's ME, i think i will still do it despite being unhappy.. what to do? i guess after so much things have happened, the burning passion in ME has already DISAPPEARED.. it's SAD to hear this BUT at least i still put the intention of leaving to the LAST alternative..

was early so i went to Popular to get some neccessities i need.. bought some organiser re-fill and a file.. then went to meet up with Huiqian before she call Wenting.. hmmm... dinner was chosen by Huiqian to have it at Beppu Menkan Japanese Noodle Restaurant.. FIRST thing that strikes the 3 of us when we got our seats is - how come the Japanese Restaurant plays Korean songs? lolx! but anyway, it didnt affect us much lahz.. just find it FUNNY!

while ordering and waiting for our food, we really have a great CHAT.. chatting from her school work to her good fortunate of having a good lab mate and to her boyfriend.. of cause, i didnt forget sharing my experience.. just 2 hours + of dialogue.. i seriously get to know Wenting better.. and this dialogue itself awaken the SLEEPING MEMORY of me and ***! hais! what to do? have to encourage others by sharing real life experiences.. it easily to make others happy but there's always someone who need to sacrifice a bit! i'm really HAPPY for her.. though she not that active because of her hetic school work, i'm HAPPY that she filled with happiness because of a good boyfriend..

see the reason why my SLEEPING MEMORY is awaken? because our age gap is very near.. and that girls at our age are always talking about boyfriends.. so, most of our subject in our dialogue is realationship.. i kept PUSHING on to my tears during the dialogue.. cause i dont wish to let my members see the weaker side of me.. you can say i'm acting strong, it's okie.. i just dont want her to see me crying..

after the dialogue, i tried calling BESTIE.. trying to see if i can still provide any help.. but BESTIE didnt pick my call.. and i was like SO WORRIED.. then, all i get is an sms from BESTIE that he will sms me tomorrow.. and that moment, i really BURST out in TEARS.. was so WORRIED for him since he told me the frustrating incident before my dialogue till my dialogue ends.. i kept looking at my hp and see how come he didnt reply my sms and stuff.. then, i was given this sms after calling him many times.. i guess i CRIED because of the awakening of the SLEEPING MEMORY and plus WORRYING for BESTIE.. i cant held my tears anymore.. like i told you before.. i dont believe in holding on to my tears.. cause i know CRYING is a way i relieve my feelings, my stress..

didnt feel any better after crying.. and MIAGRAINE attacked me.. hias! i had the WORSE round-up today.. reached home around 11plus.. and saw this 3 indian men sitting under my block.. i have been seeing them for the past 1 week.. always under the block drinking beer and playing cards.. i guess they spot me going back always at this hour too? *SCARY*


to BESTIE: if you happened to read this entry.. you know who you are.. dont have to feel bad or anything.. worrying for you didnt totally triggers me to cry.. i guess it's more because i have been talking about the SLEEPING MEMORY of me and my ex.. that's why i cried.. as you already know when you first know me, i told you before. i'm a CRYBABY ar.. and i believe crying makes me relieve my feelings and stress.. so please dont feel BAD or anything.. i guess too many things happened this week.. that's why i'm like that.. i'll be okie! dont worry=]


plans tomorrow - meeting Stella and Xueyun at SK at 10am