[ is this new year really HAPPY? ]

[ is this new year really HAPPY? ]

woke up quite LATE today.. guess the medication had turned me into a DROWSY QUEEN again! well, i hope i will never wake up! ^-^

it's a BORING day i should say.. i gave the new year daimoku session a miss! cause.. i think i arent in the condition to be able to go out NOW! with my "still" swollen eyes.. people dont know still will thought my right eye is blind! i also dont know why my luck is so BAD nowadays.. NOTHING seems to go my way! ya, i know i should not complaining so much.. as it will only takes away my good fortune and benefits.. BUT, i just cant help myself not to complain..

maybe i just need a listening ear.. someone who dont force to make that decision BUT someone who can really listen to what i want to say and sees how my heart is bleeding NOW.. my confidence and determination seems to get LOWER day by day.. maybe Xianyun is right.. maybe Xueyun is right.. and maybe Seeleng jie is right.. i should do something to it first.. dont sit there and do nothing and hopes everyday that things will get better..

can anyone tell me what went wrong? i just realised that love and hate is a just a thin margin away! you can love this person this moment, the next moment you might hate.. life is just so unpredictable.. and words can be deceiving too.. why must you keep bluffing yourself? wake up, Jessica Loh!! Dad asked me something today.. he just knows everything without me having to say.. Mom too! i'm SORRY if i have let you worried so much about ME! trust ME! i'll be okie..

alone at HOME now.. like i said.. if i'm ALONE, my thoughts will go WILD.. i'll start thinking of things.. i MUST be HAPPY! this is my RESOLUTION in 2008! from today on, i will NOT cry anymore.. NOT even a drop of tears!

tomorrow is Uncle's ROM.. just hope my eyes get better by then.. so that i can attend.. May you and shen shen be BLESSED! ^-^ got to go back to my favourite! puzzle bobble game.. i think i'm STUCK to it! =]

read a guy friend's old blog entry and saw him talking about relationship.. i just want to quote what he said.. cause i feel so RIGHT when i read it..

"I believe in a relationship both party must talk things out.. If you dont communicate how you know what the other party is thinking? and please try to give in once in a while.. Dont always be the one that never gives in. In the end, you will lost everything.. Till things are too late then you come regret for what? NO USE LIAO! Try to treasure what is in front of you or beside you. Tell them you love him/her or just send a message to tell him/her that you treasure them. i think that will make their day and even if you guys quarrel, she/he might think of the small little message and give in to u?"

i think he really speaks my thoughts NOW.. BUT this entry was years ago.. i guess this friend of mine no longer will think this way ba? people grow and changes as they ages.. if this friend of mine still think this way NOW, i think his relationship problem can be easily solved and dont have to feel so terrible.. speak up your mind ba, my dear friend! face her daringly.. i'm sure she would want to know how much you cherish her if you REALLY DO.. if not, PUT an END to this story ba.. dont let this carry on this way.. it HURTS not only YOU but HER as well........

wishing the best of everything for YOU!

to zaki: i saw your blog entry.. dont be sad yup! i know you dont want things to turn this way either.. somethings are just fated! anyway, hope to see the brand new you again! jiayou!