[ Courage is the force that creates history.... ]

Courage is the force that creates history....

it's been days since i last update.. yeah.. too LAZY and too TIRED liao le.. and past few days.. was helping Siyi do some 1000qns survey so cant reallly multi-task that much.. if not later someone will say 一心很多用.. been out for the past few days..

saturday - went for VB meeting, then discuss about MOST HEADACHE problem.. the manpower matters.. but thank god, everything can be solved.. it's within my limit and control.. then went home.. cause was coughing badly till i talked till my voice also losing liao le..

sunday - went for discussion meeting.. meeting was good.. and heard good news from Cliff that he got a new job! :) am really HAPPY for him.. saw Godma.. heard that she contracted glaucoma and had an operation.. doctor even says she might go blind in years to come.. thinking about that, my tears just flows down my cheek..

monday - met stella today.. shop for shoes and went to eat our favourite 鱼片粗米粉 and our favourite bubble tea from Koi Cafe.. hahaz! super HAPPY to meet up with her.. cause everytime i meet her, we definitely have lots of FUN things happening and i will share with my problems and she will never fail to encourage me and 让我想通..

to my Steljessically sister, Stella - THANKS FOR EVERYTHING girl! without you, jessica might probably die.. LOLX! hahaz! thks a lot! dont forget if you need someone to talk to me, jess is here too! just a phone call/sms/ and few mrt stops away!! :) hahaz!^-^

today, supposed to visit godma but mom cant get her so stayed home.. went to lunch with mom today.. had Nasi briyani.. after which, we went shopping.. got myself 2 blouses, one purple, one black.. happy happy shopping! heez=] then went dinner with mom and dad.. had 厨炒 at Chong Pang.. a fulfilling dinner..though i keep grumbling say need to walk so far for a meal.. but then it really a GREAT time eating together as a family.. too BAD didi not around.. next time, our family will grow, will have Peiyi then will have HIM! :) heez! yes.......

tomorrow, will be going for facial and shopping with mom!!=]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZHIWEN!:)

p.s. I WANT TO BE AN IRON LADY! nothing can agitate me!... YES!!! NOTHING!!!!

[ 我们勾勾手，不准不快乐！]

我们勾勾手，不准不快乐！

i guess i woke up at the wrong side of the bed today.. everything doesnt seems to go right.. eat food cannot finish, after eat liao keep going toilet and stuff.. the only good thing was that i received the letter to collect the cheque for the EAGLES award and the Edusave bursary..

came online.. then was talking happily to HIM online.. who says.. someone smsed me and spoilt my mood totally.. it's NOT the person's fault that he smsed me.. is the issue we are talking about.. hais.. i have said it before yet people took my advice as 耳边风... now the situtation is what i said before.. not taking my advice, not involving me in meetings, is that call partnership? is that call co-organised? hais.. MOOD WAS BAD! ya, i said before, i mood swing very BADLY recently..

and the person who suffered, you know who lahz.. i am sorry. i just telling to 发牢骚 not trying to say you or hurt you with my words or anything.. PLEASE PLEASE dont be angry with me!! PLEASEeeeeeeeeeeee........... because of what i said, both parties cried.. hais.. what's wrong with me today? hais.. just want to say, i am SORRY! :(

will this help to make you feel better?

[ nothing's gonna change my love for you..... ]

nothing's gonna change my love for you.....

HOME today.. slept at 2am this morning.. and woke up at around 11plus.. hais.. SO TIRED.. must be yesterday play game play too much.. hahaz! woke up, showered and waited so LONG for didi to wake up.. then went to have my brunch with mom and didi.. had duck rice.. my ulcer almost kill ME! very pain le..

came home.. watched tv awhile and went to nap.. want to sleep also didnt managed to sleep long.. hais.. cant really sleep.. but am not well so i decided to stay at home and rest.. sore throat better le..but started to cough.. was coughing the whole night yesterday..so, i didnt really sleep well last night..

accidentally knocked my ankle against my computer table.. AIYO! so pain lohz!! sobx sobx(T.T).. boring today at home.. but i cant do much.. Mom's home and i am sick... what to do? hais!know some friends around having some personal problems.. hmmm, everyone bounds to face some problems in life.. NEVER GIVE UP is the word alright? FIGHT ON! and you will see the result you want.. "When's unseen virtue, there will be visible rewards!" JIAYOU JIAYOU JIAYOU!:)

a nice song (now playing on my blog) - Nothing's gonna change my love for you

If I had to life without you near me
The days would all be empty
The nights would seem so long
With you I see forever oh so early
I might have been in love before
But it never felt this strong
Our dreams are young and we both know
They'll take us where we want to go
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you

[Chorus]
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You oughta know by now how much I love you
One thing you can be sure of
I'll never ask for more than your love
Nothing's gonna change my love for you
You oughta know by now how much I love you
The world may change my whole life through
But nothing's gonna change my love for you

If the road ahead is not so easy
Our love will lead the way for us
Like a guiding star
I'll be there for you if you should need me
You don't have to change a thing
I love you just the way you are
So come with me and share the view
I'll help you see forever too
Hold me now, touch me now
I don't want to live without you

this picture was taken during firin's engagement! :) heez! congrats FIRIN!!=]

[ i've found the greatest prize.... ]

i've found the greatest prize....

woke up at 1045am this morning.. aiyo.. today.. EXTREMELY TIRED.. cause i couldnt sleep last night.. keep waking up.. go to bed at 2am.. 3am then managed to sleep... then 5plus mom wake up i was awaken.. 6plus mom went out i woke up again.. dad wake up, i wake up again.. then 10plus way before my alarm ring, my brother called his girlfriend and i was awaken again! aiyo.. the moment i want to sleep, i was awaken.. and the moment i close my eyes, somebody just appeared and disrupted my sleep.. hahaz! you know who you are..

that's why never have any dream cause also didnt really sleep.. woke up, showered and prayed and left home.. didnt wanted to go actually but i promised mom liao.. so must keep to my promise.. took mrt to clementi then from there, took 78 to mom's workplace and waited for her.. took 143 from her place to Orchard taka.. went to Taka departmental store's Charcoal house.. and got many many things!! hahaz.. then went to Kinokuniya bookstore.. wanted to help him get comics.. but still not out yet.. instead, mom got herself a book on charcoal..

headed for brunch after that at Mos Burger.. had ebi rice burger meal with ice milk tea.. and had nuggets too.. ulcer very pain.. eat things also got difficulties.. hais! sad sad.. after which, left home.. cause i also tired, mom also tired le.. saw this baby girl today on my way home.. SO CUTE.. she know how to walk le.. so her mom let her walk.. then she walk halfway, she squant down.. SO CUTE lohz.. then i asked my mom, am i like that when i was young.. she replied ya, all kids are like that.. cause their curosity level very high.. hahaz! wonder next time if my kids will be like that too!:) heez!

came home showered and rest awhile.. just lazy around.. wanted to nap but a bit like too late liao.. dinner was packed fried rice.. shared with mom.. dont really feel like eating lahz.. but mom scare i hungry then gastric pain and stuff..

today, sore throat better le, thanks to the strepsils!! hahaz! and the honey lemon drink.. tired today! really tired.. think will try to sleep early today.. cause still having a bit of headache, think still having a bit of fever cause i 不听话... still eat fried stuff... ha! bad girl!!:( will try to eat healthier from tomorrow onwards.. heez:D

today, while sitting in front of the computer.. i start to think a lot.. thought of what i told xueyun and stella the other day.. what motive she has? do she really know me? why will she add me when i only see her once? is she just being friendly? since she added me and i approved it, she didnt even once come and talk to me.. what motive she really has? thinking about it, i think i can probably go crazy.. and even feel like crying.. hais.. aiyo.. dont think too much jessica loh.. if not, you will sure go crazy...... yes, dont think too much!!=] be optimistic.. that the real jessica...

HAPPINESS is being with the one you love and the one who loves you too:)

[ 勇气可嘉的一天.... ]

勇气可嘉的一天....

stayed home today.. was running a fever after i got home yesterday.. maybe because i cried yesterday then at first already having sore throat and flu.. so ya, it got worse after the crying.. pop panadol and i felt much better today.. got sore throat then got ulcer.. hais.. feel so TERRIBLE.. even lunch also gobble down.. cause really not in the mood to even taste the food..

got home and pop panadol and nap again.. hais.. i HATE the feeling of falling sick.. really HATE it.. woke up and got online.. mom's home today.. so she prepared udon soup for dinner today.. NICE NICE.. really feel much much better after eating it..

today, also dont know why.. suddenly got so many things i want to ask.. really dont know where did all my courage comes from.. sometimes i just feel that, the lesser i know, the less chance that i will get upset.. but if i dont know, the questions will just run in my mind and i will anyhow imagine things and stuff.. hais.. but at times, i still hope to know.. even if i know i will get upset.. that's me.. too curious sometimes also not good.. am i right?

Hope transforms pessimism into optimism. Hope is invincible. Hope changes everything. It changes winter into summer, darkness into dawn, descent into ascent, barrenness into creativity, agony into joy. Hope is the sun. It is light. It is passion. It is the fundamental force for life's blossoming.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

[ IRON LADIES day-out!!!! ]

IRON LADIES day-out!!!!

woke up at almost 11am today.. then prepare myself and went out at about 12pm.. went to meet Stella at Toa Payoh.. she was late so i went up to her house.. went to have Subway at HDB hub.. had subway club with coke and chocolate chip cookie.. Stella had the same meal but ice lemon tea.. after which, went to walk around awhile to get our food digested.. then Stella went to trim her eyebrow..

headed to city hall after that.. was slightly a bit late.. then we went to Marina square.. Xueyun hasnt eat.. so went to pei her eat first.. wanted to sing K but then 3 of us all SICK.. all SORE THROAT and stuff.. so walked around.. then our manjong yin suddenly just raises!! hahaz! but 3 person cant play.. so decided to go to Xueyun's place.. cause she got a chihuahua at home!:) got ourselves a drink at Starbucks.. so funny.. want a carrier then make a huha there.. hahaz! so funny.. but the person who serve us very FRIENDLY! heez!=]

headed to her place and received his sms.. he wasnt really happy about his grade.. called him and he sound really frustrated.. hais.. feel so bad suddenly.. dont know what can i do to make him feel better.. i arent there with him.. all i can do was to comfort him and dont do anything that will make him fan.. stayed at Xueyun's place.. gossip a bit, played with cookie and did manicure.. ya, xueyun did it for us!

stayed till xueyun have to go for meeting.. so 难得for the 3 of us to gather.. headed to JP with Stella.. had Oyster mian xian then went to walk around awhile.. got Mom a bag today from URS today at City link.. then also the Dead see salt from JP.. got a membership card from there.. was almost 9pm when i left JP with Stella.. feel kind of bad that he was a bit upset that i didnt let him know that i am going home late.. and when he woke up, he didnt see me online.. he got really worried where i got..

his tone through sms sound so scary.. i really feel so guilty that i turned quiet suddenly after reading his sms.. hais.. and when i got home, was talking about this till i actually cried.. ya, just feel bad today that i made him worried and make him even more frustrated.. i am sorry.. didnt mean it really.. i really didnt mean it.. i think i get EMO easily these few days.. kind of mood swing too.. hais.. dont know what's wrong with me also.. hmm, but i know after a sleep today, i will feel better tomorrow!=] stay positive!!:)

look at some pics of the day!!!=]


stella and xueyun:)


me and my steljessically sister, stella:P


xueyun da jie and me!=]


IRON LADIESs!!!!:D

IRON LADIES with cookie!^-^

It's important to have the courage to say what needs to be said at the crucial moment.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

[ 因为受过伤所以害怕再次受伤害..... ]

因为受过伤所以害怕再次受伤害.....

was supposed to go for the Youth Leaders training course.. but i didnt.. cause wasnt feeling that well so decided to sleep in longer.. slept till 9plus 10 then he smsed me.. so was awaken.. then smsed awhile then went back to sleep.. slept till 1plus almost 2 then wake up.. then shower and prayed.. then went to buy brunch..

was sitting down on the sofa and watching this Hong Kong drama.. <最美丽的第七天>, very touching.. make me CRY like mad today.. then watched korean drama <加油，金顺!>.. then also CRY like mad.. aiyo.. dont know what's wrong with me today... hmmm, i think i wasnt feeling well.. so mood also not good.. wrapped myself in the blanket then sneezing like NON-STOP.. he felt bad cause he isnt here.. hmmm, dont have to feel bad.. i am okie de..

Mom got me dinner today.. had chicken rice but i didnt finish lahz.. too oily le.. hais.. damn sad to hear a bad news today.. why 老天爷 so 残忍? why must them be seperated just because of that? and why must she do this to him? hais! sad sad... hope everythin will be okie.. tomorrow, will be meeting Xueyun and Stella for some catch-up.. will be going to try Kenko Fish spa!! :)

a old song to recommend... 细水长流

年少时候 谁没有梦
无意之中 你将心愿透露
就在你的生日的时候 我将小小口琴送
最难忘记 你的笑容容

友情的细水慢慢流 流到了你我的心中
曾在球场边为你欢呼 你跌伤我背伏
夜里流星飞渡 想像着他日的路途
晚风听着我们壮志无数

年少时候 谁没有愁
满腔愤慨 唯有你能听得懂
就在你失意的时候 我将那首歌吹奏
琴声悠悠 解我轻忧

岁月的细水慢慢流
流到了别离的时候轻拍你的肩
听我说朋友不要太惆怅 霓陉纵然再嚣张
我你的步履有方向 成败不论去
莫将昔日遗忘

多年以后 又再重逢
我们都有了疲倦的笑容
问一声我的朋友 何时再为我吹奏
是否依旧 是否依旧

人生的际遇千百种 但有知心长相重
人愿长久 水愿长流 年少时候

[ 太想爱你是我压抑不了的念头.... ]

太想爱你是我压抑不了的念头......

i cried myself to sleep last night.. was kind of pissed off with my dad.. just cant stop thinking what he has done to the family.. suddenly, i just like finishing my education faster and move out with this house and start my own family.. have a good husband and have many adorable kids.. hahaz.. with that, i fallen asleep..

slept at 1plus this morning.. woke up 10plus with my eyes really PAINFUL.. i think because i cried? had a dream last night too.. slept that i got pregnant.. hmmm, it's after marriage huh.. then it's a baby girl.. then my husband accompany me to ultrasound and stuff.. then suddenly, i was awaken because of a great pain at my abdomen area.. LOLX! sound like is baby kicking.. woke up, showered and waited for Peiyi to come then go for lunch.. was kind of pissed off with my brother.. really very childish really very naive.. dont know what should i do to knock some sense into him...

had long john silver for brunch today.. then headed to work then.. finished work at 4pm.. work was kind of IRRITATED, PISSED OFF and ANNOYED.. there's this china woman giving flyers beside me.. my flyer is A5 size.. hers A4 size.. then she keep standing nearer to me.. then the tip of her paper keep poking me lohz..2 hours she poke me more than 20times! OH MY TIAN!!! aiyoz.. end up, we changed place.. then okie liao..

finished work at 4pm.. then went for acupuncture and ba guan with Peiyi.. cause my neck and shoulder really ache till i cant take it liao le.. was a bit painful but bearable.. cause what is most important is the outcome.. now still aching but not as bad liao.. headed home.. cant shower for 2hours.. Physician say maybe because i always look downwards or because sit in front of the computer for too long.. i think also because i didnt sleep well..

had dried hor fan for dinner.. suddenly feel so cold.. amd wrapping myself in the blanket.. so cold so cold.. going to eat panadol and sleep later.. and if i'm well, will be going to the training course tomorrow.. watched the show Gigi hosting.. the 女儿国's women can be quite poor thing.. they 走婚 and give birth without any law registered marriage.. the man can just break up with them and YET, they cannot do anything.. oh my tian! how can be like that? thank god i am not born there.. hahaz!:)

Lies are truly frightening, because they not only deceive others but also destroy one's own humanity.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

[ 爱你不是两三天... ]

爱你不是两三天...

woke up at 1030am this morning.. kind of reluctant to wake up de.. but then.. no choice.. have to get up, eat my brunch and go to work.. had laksa for brunch today.. then left for work at about 12pm.. work was okie today.. the flow of the people was quite a lot.. still not so bad.. but hand very tired lohz.. shoulder also...

finished work at 4pm.. then left home.. showered.. and took a rest.. sit in front of the computer, watch tv and played games! then left home at 630pm to meet Eunice for dinner.. decided to go to Xin Wang Hong Kong Cafe for dinner.. found ourselves a seat and waited for Ann Nee to come.. i had hongkong iced milk tea and pork chop with fries.. not really that nice but then acceptable..

had a great catch-up with them.. hmm, really happy for Eunice that she's able to fulfill her dream to go to SUJ to further studies.. really grateful cause without her and Jin Haw's encouragement.. i wont be able to leave my job and go back to school to continue my studies.. and without them, i wont be the me today.. wont be able to attain so many achievement.. thanks! thanks a lot.. wish u all the best in your studies too!=] it is my dream to go to SUJ to study also.. want to take up Japanese too!:) Jiayou le!!

back home and continue talking to HIM and playing game.. internet kind of giving me quite a lot of problem recently.. dont know what's wrong lohz.. hais.. kind of sleeping late recently and talking online and stuff.. mom kind of making noise and stuff.. hais.. irritated..

tomorrow, will be working.. as usual.. that's all.. bored!~

Gratitude makes a person modest. A sense of gratitude expands the heart.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

[ 我只在乎你的在乎.... ]

我只在乎你的在乎....

woke up at around 10.40am this morning.. SUPER SUPER tired.. all because of didi.. make me wake up so early yesterday.. brunch with mom, didi and peiyi.. then accompany mom to buy some stuff.. then me and peiyi headed for work... started work at 1plus.. saw so many PUBLIC DISPLAY OF AFFECTION while working.. old and young also have.. AIYOYOZ!!! and finished work at 4plus.. then.. we went to walk around.. got bubble tea and some buns and donuts with Four leaves..

i just addicted to donuts from Four leaves now!! hahaz! shall get some for him when he comes back.. headed home after that.. showered and came online.. wanted to sleep but cant really sleep.. so just stay up and watch tv.. Mom cooked dinner today.. had Udon for dinner today.. YUM YUM! still loves home cooked food.. then watched the show -省钱王.. then they were advertising for Hong kong.. some HK shopping areas, 海味店 and one of HK's island, 南丫岛.. there's this beancurd jelly they recommend.. look so nice.. hope got chance next time can go there:)

tomorrow, will be working at 12pm.. then will be meeting Eunice for dinner!!=] too bored, saw this test on Shin's blog.. so try doing.. hahaz!=]

1. How old will you be in 3 years?
- 24years old! :)

2. Do you think you'll be married by then?
- i dont think so....

3. What do you look forward to most in the next 2 months?
- the start of my job...

4. Who was the last person you called?
- HIM:P

5. Have you ever played a team sport?
- yup:)

6. Who was the last person to text you?
- HIM=]

7. Who was the last person you hugged?
- HIM? i think so...

8. What were you doing at midnight last night?
- watching tv, talking to HIM:)

9. Parents separated/divorced/married?
- Married.

10. Last time you saw your dad?
- last night

11. What happened at 11:00 a.m. today?
- having my beauty shower...

12. How's your mood today?
-mixture of everything.. happy, emo, tired..

13. If you could be anywhere right now, where would it be?
- China!! :(

14. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
-Bare footed.

15. Are you a social person?
- yup~

16. What was the last thing you drank?
- Ju hua cha

17. Favorite ice cream?
- Chocolate chip.

18. What is your favorite dessert?
- hmm alot~

19. Whats your favorite color?
- purple, pink, blue, white.

20. What Jelly do you put on your PBJ?
-? huh? what's that?

21. Do you like coffee?
- i am allergy to caffeine!

22. How many glasses of water a day do you drink on average?
- erm~ water ar~ dont noe leh!

23. What do you drink in the morning?
- Green Tea

24. Would you rather kiss someone with or without a tongue ring?
- Without.

25. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
- why should i when i have the whole bed?

26. Do you know how to play poker?
- of cos~

27. Whats so good about Fridays?
- can stay up late, and slp late..

28. Any plans for this week?
- YES! :)

29. Do you eat out or at home more often?
- eat out.

30. How big is your TV?
-29 inch...

31. Ever stolen a street sign?
-nope, SIAOZ!

32. Do you keep a piggy bank?
- yes, used to.

33. What kind of camera do you have?
- sony de....

34. Have you ever been in an ambulance?
-Nope.

35. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool?
-Ocean

36. Do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seat?
-Window seat.

37. Do you know how to drive a stick shift?
- Huh? what's that?

38. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
- anything of my liking~

39. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7?
- Yes!:)

40. Do you speak any other language?
- English, Chinese, Cantonese, Hokkien, a bit of Malay, German

41. Can you roll your tounge?
- i cant...

42. Who is the funniest person you know?
- Alot of them~ including myself=]

[ My LOVE would get you HOME.... ]

My LOVE would get you HOME....

woke up at 8am despite sleeping at 2am.. woke up just because of my dear brother lohz.. have to go CASE because of the cheating incident that happened when he purchase PSP at Sim Lim Square.. Well, he himself also dumb dumb lohz.. hais.. left home at 9am.. and took MRT to Commonwealth.. from there, we took 111 to Ghim Moh..

CASE is located at the Ulu Pandan Community Building.. took quite some time to get the thing done.. end up, we knows they say i cannot sign on behalf of our parents cause i not offically 21 yet.. aiyoz! waste my trip there lohz.. after which, headed down to Clementi for lunch.. and my favourite congee, shared with them carrot cake and drank a cup of sugarcane drink... after lunch, went to trim my eyebrow.. hahaz! ya, ai mei mahz.. cant help.

after which, the person called and asked us to go down to work at 1pm.. so headed back to Yishun.. work was pretty tough.. had to distribute flyers under the tunnel linking from the train station to Northpoint.. it's really WARM and there's this uncle singing there.. aiyoz, his voice damn ANNOYING and IRRITATING!! make me damn giddy and had a headache because of it! LOLX! finished work at 4plus.. then left home..

Peiyi came to our place too.. waited for brother and mom to come back.. then i had a shower and went to nap awhile.. was really TIRED.. shoulder aching, back aching.. dinner was fried beehoon.. hmmm, eat till super full.. today's work makes me how it feels to be standing there for hours to distribute flyers.. not easy lohz.. plus not everyone will take.. and some people very ridiculous.. dont talk it's okie.. but dont give me that idiotic face.. aiyoz!! $#%@!&^!! hahaz! cant stand it..

heard a good news from HIM today.. about 2 friends we are concern about.. am HAPPY they are now together le.. hahaz! cause i think for 2 person to meet and become friends is already NOT easy... not saying about becoming an item.. therefore, if you have the fate to meet someone, and become friends, and one day... become an item.. and even become married couples.. give birth and live together.. i think it is easy to say than done.. all these required FATE, both parties's patience and efforts!! :)

i will work hard and make it come true.. but of cause cant do it alone:) today, will try to sleep early!=] working tomorrow....

If you are neglecting things you should be doing, forgetting your purpose in life because of the relationship you're in, then you're on the wrong path. A healthy relationship is one in which two people encourage each other to reach their respective goals while sharing each other's hopes and dreams. A relationship should be a source of inspiration, invigoration and hope.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

[ 你的微笑结束了疲倦 ..... ]

你的微笑结束了疲倦....

What does your eyes say.....
- Cutie-Pie
You are the mor romantic tipe, and likes to treat your other half so that they feel good!! YOu also like love stories (even if you don't let anyone know) :)

What type of guy is perfect for you?
Sensitive on the inside, tough on the outside - A man who knows you and knows how to please you. He may watch those dreaded chick flicks with you, and pretend to hate them, but secretely, he crys on the inside. This is the guy for you.

I guess i am really TOO BORED till i keep taking tests these few days.. Hahaz! miss the school days.. miss taking exams.. miss changing diaper.. miss showering patients.. miss my peeps.. miss my clinque.. miss my besties.. miss HIM!!!!!! :) i am just being too bored..

woke up today at 9am.. and suddenly i just feel a EXTREME pain at my abdominal area.. i dont know why.. is it gastric pain or gastric ulcer? i think i also scared Him.. he must be really worried about me.. breakfast was laksa and you tiao.. ate with mom today.. then left home with mom.. went to Clementi to settle some stuff then went for my haircut and rebonding!! yes! i waited for 2years lohz.. never do anything to my hair.. cant dye.. cant rebond.. cant perm.. the result come not like the previous time i did the rebond.. cause i got hair that touches the shoulder.. so some part not so straight lohz.. cause hair short.. but i guess this length okie lahz.. not too long, not too short..

sat there few hours.. He say i 爱美不要命... Want to become more pretty also because of who ar.. lolx! went to eat MOS burger with mom after doing my hair.. dont know why.. i finished my food way before mom.. mom say i like super hungry.. then took mrt home from clementi.. i slept all the way through out.. think i too tired liao.. reached home wanted to sleep de.. but cant seems to be able to fall asleep.. so i came online..

a long ago song to recommend - 大城小爱by 王力宏

乌黑的发围盘成一个圈
缠绕所有对你的眷恋
隔着半透明的脸嘴里说的语言
完全没有欺骗
屋顶灰色瓦片安静的画面
灯火是你美丽那张脸
终于找到所有流浪的终点
你的微笑结束了疲倦
千万不要说天长地久
免的你觉得不切实际
想多么简单就多么简单
是妈妈告诉我的哲理

脑袋都是你心里都是你
小小的爱在大城里好甜蜜
念的都是你全部都是你
小小的爱在大城里只为你倾心

乌黑的发围盘成一个圈
缠绕所有对你的眷恋
终于找到所有流浪的终点
你的微笑结束了疲倦
千万不要说天长地久
免的你觉得我不切实际
想多么简单就多么简单
让我大声的对你
I'm thinking of you

脑袋都是你心里都是你
小小的爱在大城里好甜蜜
念的都是你全部都是你
小小的爱在大城里只为你倾心

那回程的票根你留做纪念
不必害怕面对离别
剪掉一丝头发让我放在胸前
走到那里都有你陪
相随~~~~~~~~~~~

脑袋都是你心里都是你
小小的爱在大城里好甜蜜
念的都是你全部都是你
小小的爱在大城里只为你倾心
脑袋都是你心里都是你
小小的爱在大城里好甜蜜
OH~~念的都是你全部都是你
小小的爱在大城里只为你倾心
拉拉拉拉拉~~~~~~~~~拉拉拉拉拉
拉拉拉~~~~~~~拉拉拉拉

乌黑的发围盘成一个圈
缠绕所有对你的眷恋
那一种寸步不离的感觉
我知道就叫做永远


This was me when i was 16yrs old - first time do rebonding


This was me 3 yrs back - my 2nd time doing rebonding


and this is TODAY! dont look that straight as before right?

past 2 times very straight because of my hair length.. but this time look more natural? hahaz! sound like comforting myself.. hope after wash would look okie.. Jess really looks very different years back and now?

[ Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.... ]

Anything that can go wrong will go wrong


Took this test - Attitude Test

The result is calm and quiet- you are the sort of person who likes to take life slowly... just one day at a time.. You usually know the differnce between right and wrong. You believe in yourself. you put yourself in other peoples shoes and see how it feels to be them and then handle a situation accordingly.your attitude towards life is very positive.... You are liked by all and are a great friend. The flip side is that sometimes you care too much about other people and dont do what you really wanna do..


Took this test - Which Fairytale are you?

Results - You are beauty and the beast! After your father was kidnapped by a beast you traded yourself to save him and became the prisoner, but you fell in love with the beast and just on the brink of his death you kissed him and broke a spell a good witch had cast on him as punishment for judging people for their looks. He turned back into a human and you rejoined your father and you married the beast. You are not energetic and love to read anything and everything. You do what is best for your family and friends, you know when your needed and when your not. Filled with adventure and happiness you never give up.

What kind of husband/wife will you be?

Results - Your gonna satisfy your partner and make them the happiest person in the world.

dont know if all these test results are true.. but no harm trying when i am BORED!! hahaz! woke up at 10plus.. had my breakfast and watched tv.. then after that, went back for a nap at about 1plus.. when i just about to fall asleep, didi came in and disturb.. OH MAN! i just hate that when i am going to fall asleep..

woke up at 4plus.. then went to shower.. then left home at about 5plus.. headed to Northpoint to get my dinner.. got a crave for Subway.. headed there.. got a Footlong Subway melt with my favourite chocolate chip cookies and a med. coke.. first bite on the sandwich already can KILLS! my gum just aches to the max.. till my ears also pain.. aiyoz! i cant stand it!!

waited quite awhile before my bus came.. wanted to reach there on the dot.. but then.. i'm still EARLY! went to Aunty Helen's place for planning.. i guess our family of district 3 is getting bigger.. with now 1Md, 3WDs, 2YWDs and 2 YMDs leaders!! kind of fortunate that my assistant now is Zhiwei.. my friend since pri6!! :) hope i can work well with her.. And this month meeting, i can kind of slack.. cause i'm just tasked to plan a game/think of a song for the discussion meeting.. heez!:) my head also aching because of the gum pain i am having.. sobx!

back home at 11plus.. and now.. i am chatting with HIM!! :) feel kind of guilty that he stayed up just to make sure i reached home safely liao.. and that has to sacrifice his sleep just to talk to me.. aiyoz! but i feel really TOUCHED with what he said today.. really.. i guess nobody has ever said this to me.. i can tell you, my heart really melts!=] was kind of shocked too.. sound like a fairytale! BUT.... i know he means what he said!=]

you are my destination:)

[ am i really BEST in everything? ]

am i really BEST in everything?

Took this test on facebook - What are you born to do?

BEST AT EVERYTHING - you are the social person who make useful contacts. you introduce important people to influential people and always reap some sort of reward as a result...but you don't enjoy the spotlight as much. you prefer to stay in the back as there is more room to stretch and you like the feeling that you are the one with the power and most of the time that is true... you will do well in almost any field you know how to flatter without being too obvious and you can make just about anyone like you.

And another test - What type of woman are you?

You are lovely and caring. You help others and spread out a lot of sympathy. Your life aim maybe is to serve the people. But your weakness is that you forget about yourself, your own needs. All your time is hold back for your friends and family. You are always there for people in trouble. Ready for any emergency. You make a lot of sacrifices just to be a good human. But every woman has her needs, her longings and a destiny. Don't loose yourself in work or curing other people's souls. You will have your own problems in your life. Another problem is that you don't say your opinion when it's right and important to say it. People trample onto your soul if you are always so kind and lovely and helpful. They will play on you. Though you should try to relax more and enjoy your life, you should not loose the gift that was given to you to help others . Not everyone is created this way... You are unique and rare!

slept at 1plus this morning and woke up at 10plus.. then shower, prayed.. and hesitating.. whether to go for the meeting or stay home and rest.. i hesitated quite awhile actually.. cause i was sneezing quite badly.. so i really don't wish to go out.. plus i know you stayed in the hotel today just to be online to talk to me.. therefore, i don't wish this chance just slipped away..

waited for you to wake up and i went online.. stomach 不听话today.. went to toilet twice right after i took my brunch today... hmmm, ya... forgotten to mention that i had fishball dry kway teow today.. nice nice.. Auntie added quite a lot of vinegar in.. and chili also.. i also dont know why i just love to eat vinegar.. even when i eat shark fins also.. i will add in lots of vinegar..

oh ya. and forgotten something.. i had a dream last night too.. aiyoz.. every night also dream like that makes me very tired cause i wont totally go the sleep when i dream.. dream that i gave birth to babies! hahaz! what kind of dream is that? i even dreamt that i am feeding babies milk and changing diaper!!!! hahaz! i think i miss KKH too much liao le.. hahaz..

taken flu medicine just now and drank 2 cups of hot drink.. now, i am feeling better but feel like SLEEPING lohz!! dont feel like doing anything but just stay home and sleep.. feel touched that he stayed in the hotel today just to talk to me online.. feel really blessed and loved now.. lolx! people dont jealous lahz! HAHAZ!! :)

waiting for mom to call me for dinner! dont know what to eat.. so we had KFC as dinner.. LOLX! mom is like so concern about him suddenly she asked about him.. like when he coming back and stuff.. He seems worried that mom wouldnt approve us.. but i am sure she will.. what can she do when her daughter likes ar? just blessings to us! hahaz!:)

Ideal love is fostered only between two sincere, mature and independent people. It is the inner struggle to polish these attributes that is the key. ... Real love is not two people clinging to each other; it can only be fostered between two strong people secure in their individuality.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

[ 爱上你越来越无可救药..... ]

爱上你越来越无可救药......

woke up at 10plus today... damn tired.. think because i got a nightmare that's why i so TIRED.. dreamt of Daryl and him.. aiyoz.. so SCARY manz the dream.. dont wish to elaborate cause dont wish to be reminded of it.. told him about the dream and he comforted me with his words.. he really made me feel better cause he trusted me a lot.. was very hungry.. so wake up and shower, prayed and went to buy makan.. had you tiao and laksa!! got a crave for laksa today!! yum yum.. then watch tv awhile then decided to go back to sleep.. nappy awhile.. dad say i'm a piggy.. LOLX! tired mahz..

slept till Miaozhen called me.. told me the meeting time and venue.. met them at Bugis mrt at 5pm.. as usual lohz.. they are late lohz.. wanted to eat pastamania.. end up no malays come.. so we went to eat swensens.. had Salmon 'n' mushroom baked rice.. yum yum.. but not that full.. cause last meal was morning till then.. went to TCC to relax.. i had Fruitti Delight.. got blueberry,orange, strawberry, longan, soda and mint in it.. NICE NICE.. others had caffine drinks which i cant take..

Shaun had some green tea drink.. had a mouth of it.. oh my tian.. it taste like the one i had that time with Chern Fern and Xiao bai at Starbucks.. really damn disgusting lohz! eeeeeeeeee.... and we cut cake for Miaozhen there too.. some dark chocolate cake with strawberry on top.. cant fail to remind me of Ben ben when i eat strawberry.. seems like guys nowadays love to eat strawberry so much.. Shaun also.. and HIM also.. love to eat strawberry ice-cream right? hahaz! i still remember worz..

so sorry ar.. you only go china two weeks.. i even forgotten that you wear half framed specs!! hahaz! dont heart pain and sad sad lahz.. he's still not well.. am really worried for him actually.. cause i know he dont like to take medicine.. hahaz! who loves to take medicine ar.. but, i still hope you will take care of yourself huh! dont let me worry till i fall sick also hor!:)

though the meet-up with them is short, i really enjoyed it.. Asked Carolyn about the uncle that i went to donate platelets to.. hais.. he passed away months again.. damn sad lahz when i heard about it.. took 851 home from Bugis then when i was about to alight.. saw this young boy talking to his mom in hokkien.. suddenly, something just strike my mom.. kids who speak in cantonese sounds really CUTE but then kids who speak in hokkien, eh..... sound a bit vulgar.. hahaz! dont you think so?

my turn to going to fall sick.. i'm always like that when i am having holidays.. falling sick always at the wrong time.. what to do? hais...

saw this while browsing through Ikeda's quotes...

Even married people were once strangers. Therefore, without patience and the effort to understand one another, things are likely not to go well. We need patience in order to become happy.

There are many who dream about experiencing happiness without the patience. But that is a dream. And a dream is just that--a dream, a fairy tale. It is to wish for a childish, easy life. This illusion breaks up many marriages. The pursuit of such happiness can only make one miserable.

It is important to make the effort to calmly construct something together. From there, real love develops. Real marriage is when you have been married for twenty-five years and feel an even deeper love than you did when you first met. Love deepens. Love that does not is merely on the level of simple likes and dislikes.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

I think it's quite true.. to fins your TRUE HAPPINES, all you need is PATIENCE and EFFORT.. Without all these, everything is just a dream.. And in love, you need to make an efoort to construct something together.. from there on, love can develops:)

[ 我只想静静的陪在你身边...... ]

我只想静静的陪在你身边......

start work at 8am today.. dont know.. have a crave today for hot milk tea and 菠萝包! hahaz! and i really bought a 菠萝包 and hot milk tea from 旺cafe.. hahaz! NICE NICE manz! start work at 8am.. and went for debrief from 9am onwards.. only managed to end the briefing at around 11plus..

took picture and write notes for everyone on the book Sook Mun got for us.. and... Amanda got us file too!! ya, my fatty1 and skinny, i wont forget you girls de manz! anyway, we'll see each other together in TTSH yup! for the time-being, please take care of yourself.. really misses the babies manz! L3 is going home today le.. i'm gonna miss you BABY boy!!May Gohonzon bless you yupz! Please grow up to be a strong kid!:) he's really CUTE lohz.. aiyoz! hope my children will be as CUTE as him too in future..

went back to school at 1.30pm.. also got back my CP results.. got an A but i arent really satisfied.. cause it's just a low A.. took bus851 to bugis then took mrt back to tanah merah.. and from tanah merah, we took bus2 to school.. didnt wait for the KKH shuttle bus cause really packed somemore that time is lunch time.. cracked lots of joke while on the way to school..

was just a short briefing by Mr Tay.. and a short catch-up with clinque before holiday starts.. misses them so much.. Daphne, Nad, Shiffa, Farhan and Ramlan!! :) miss miss.. Supposed to go for makan together.. But Daphne wanted to go visit Firin in the hospital.. Then Nad and Shiffa went dating.. so i decided to go home and rest.. so went home with Sook Mun..

was watching a Korean drama.. and saw these meaningful words.. “其实我对你的要求不多，只是想和你一起手牵着手一起去吃好吃的东西。上班时，有人为我打领带，穿袜子。我只是希望你能陪在我身边。” meaningful? actually what they trying to tell us is that being simple is enough.. dont expect so much.. just be contented..

I'm HAPPY that today is my last day of CP.. BUT.... i'm not happy cause you're not around.. if not, we'll be out playing and eating.. that would be very FUN i guess.. sad.. was so IRRITATED today with the new msn didi download.. calls keep cannot hear properly.. then have to end call and call again.. then restart com, sign in, sign out msn.. so FRUSTRATED lohz.. keep saying HELLO, WEI WEI.... aiyoz! ARGHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

let's show the picture we took today...


TTSH GROUP 2 with Ms Poh!

happiness is a direction, not a place...

[ 世界上没什么是理所当然.... ]

世界上没什么是理所当然........

work was okie today.. but was pretty upset today when i came to work.. people simply just dont understand english.. what's the meaning of staying at your assigned task? going to graduate liao still like that... i just dont understand what these people are thinking lohz.. hais.. got super upset till i got headache.. then dont know why.. since yesterday night, my old surgical wound area in pain.. aiyoz.. walking was a tough job to me too..

not many babies to feed today.. cause most of them are with their mummies.. and the only 3 lodging ones, people snatched to feed liao.. damn idiotic lohz... hais.. then after passing report, me and fatin went out to take temperature for the babies outside with the mummies.. hais.. went for break at 5pm.. ate dinner and ate ice-cream from Mac, yes.... my FAVOURITE hot-fudge sundae..

then after dinner.. dont know why.. stomach pain like HELL! and had diarrhoea.. was feeding and changing babies.. somemore nursery so cold.. aiyoz.. went to toilet 4times lohz!! sobx! treat it as clear bowel ba.. hahaz! it should be cleared everyday supposedly... left home at 9pm.. was pretty lucky today.. i think Gohonzon was kind enough to me.. managed to have a seat after i got up for one bus-stop.. was considered lucky.. if not, have my headache, and pain at the surgical wound area.. i would probably faint if i stand the shakey bus..

got home.. showered and prayed then got online.. had a chat with him.. my day was quite bad today.. but i am okie after eating the ice-cream.. dont worry.. i just need a sleep and i'll be okie..

[ i was the superwoman of the day...... ]

i was the superwoman of the day......

work was pretty terrible today.. was on the same shift with the horrible woman everyone is saying.. ya, the senior midwife.. but in that hospital, senior midwife = enrolled nurse.. anyway, that's not the main point lahz.. it's because she love to command people around to do things for her so ya.. that's the reason why people called her the horrible woman..


friends of mine either love to crowd around in a big group, or go into the nursery to kpo, feed babies and stuff.. end up, i'm always left ALONE outside.. hais.. answering call bells, changing bed...... went to break at 4pm.. then came back.. was asked to do hypocount for patients.. then chart i/o.. then i was asked to do the parameters for the entire ward! yes, 32 patients... thank god got Huda to help me.. though only help me take temperature, but better than nothing.. i took all the BP, HR, RR, pain score.. hais..

walking here and there.. only left the ward at 9.10pm.. OT liao... then took bus 851 home together with Sook Mun.. then came home and came online to do my research.. topic was on: "Kawasaki Disease"... haiyoz.. he's sick.. am kind of worried.. cause i know he dont likes to take medication and stuff.. how i wish i can be there lohz.. hais! just hope that he will be fine..

2 more days in attachment.. tomorrow, i'll be in the nursery! :)

[ 感情丰富的一天.... ]

感情丰富的一天....

as usual.. when my idiotic brother and dad comes home, they will NEVER bound to contribute some NOISE POLLUTION that will DEFINITELY interrupt my sleep in my lala land.. TIRED was the ONLY word i can describe how i feel this morning.. got out of my cosy bed at 4.45am.. wash my hair, showered, did my morning prayers and left home at about 5.15am.. then waited for the first bus to come.. the first bus came kind of late today.. managed to reach the ward at 6.20am..

went to the locker and deposit my bag and stuff.. then shower baby.. supposed to shower L1 de.. end up because L1 just took milk so cannot shower him first.. so shower L3 instead.. anyway, both of them also very CUTE lahz!.. L1 super CUTE, drank milk then hiccups!! hahaz! SO CUTE!! :) I wanted to adopt the baby that is given up for adoption.. but then they say cannot, cause only married couples can adopt babies.. so SAD!!

feel so sad lohz.. how come mummies can be so CRUEL to give up the babies they carried for 10months? hais.. i know sometimes the current situation dont allow some of them to keep the babies.. but then, at some situation, they can keep the babies de.. hais! so poor things.. they are just innocent cuties that came to this cruel world..

had mac today for brunch.. eat till so FULL.. want to vomit.. enjoyed talking to mummies today.. and they shared about their love and pregnancy experience with me.. mummies really very wei da.. and this daddy told me something that i feel that it's quite true..

"True love cannot be describe and express through words. If a man were to tell you he love your eyes, your whatever.... these are all temporary feelings.. Cause true feelings cannot be describe easily by words...."

hahaz! sound true and after hearing, it really makes me ponder.. Cause i always wanted my coming relationship to last till marriage.. i dont know how much hope i should put into it.. though i have trust, i have confidence.. but that doesnt mean things will always go the way i want it to be.. 有时候，希望越大失望越大啊！BUT.. i choose to stay positive.. just do my best can already.. 我会付出我的真心来让这爱直到永远.... this is the way everyone should think ba.. it SHOULDNT be what, 不在乎天长地久，只在乎曾经拥有！this is NOT the correct way of thinking..

i dont know why.. suddenly, while updating the blog, i suddenly become a bit EMO.. and a bit sad.. a bit feeling crying also.. i also dont know why.. maybe i just think too much ba.. i am a simple girl.. but at least, my brain cells just like to complicate itself.. hais.. dont think so much Jessica loh... if not you will grow old very soon! hahaz! i will be fine after a while.. just need some time to let my brain cells de-complicate itself.. hahaz! what kind of english is that? de-complicate..

went home after work.. wanted to sleep.. but then cant sleep.. so many disturbances.. kind of miss him actually.. hais.. dont know how's his cough already.. the weather there cold.. somemore he love to take cold drinks.. had packed dinner with mom at home.. managed to finish the food.. surprisingly.. cause i feel cold, then wanted something warm to keep myself warm..

tomorrow, will be on pm shift.. thursday also.. and thursday, i'll be in the nursery AGAIN! yeah yeah!! :) friday will be my last day of attachment.. sad sad.. so fast. going to be a full-flinge nurse liao.. oh my tian!

*straightening my thoughts*

[ 我们未来的主人翁！！ ]

我们未来的主人翁！！

went to sleep at 12plus this morning.. and then.. dad and didi came back home around 3am and spoilt my sweet dreams! aiyoz!! terrible, horrible, vegetable........ end up, i have to count down till i wake up at 4plus nearly 5am.. got myself ready.. and drank the super digusting chicken essence with american ginseng.. hmmm, actually chicken essence itself is okie de.. but then, got the ginseng that makes it taste really terrible..

went to work and realised i am arranged to be in the nursery today!! oh my tian!! all the babies are so adorable!! went in and the first baby i fed is a baby boy!! hahaz! fed a total of 8 babies throughout my shift today!! oh... i love the babies.. especially that baby girl who sucks the milk so fast and burp so loud!! hahaz! she's CUTE lahz...

Puteri came on afternoon shift and came into the nursery.. then she say she only like baby boys.. dont like baby girls!! why? aiyoz.. i think the gender doesnt matter.. as long as the baby is HEALTHY!! hahaz! am i right? agree ma? went break with Huda and Sheila.. cant finished my food.. i also dont know why.. maybe because the food not really nice and i also dont feel like eating after i see the food..

went home at 3pm.. called him and he teased me!! hahaz! i really like babies what!! they are so adorable.. went home and slept till almost 7pm.. the weather too cold liao... and i came home coughing and sneezing after being caught in the rain.. i mustnt fall sick cause tomorrow, i have to be in the hospital to bathe babies at 6.15am.. oh gosh! got to wake up really early..

came online and realised you added me in facebook.. was kind of shocked to see you adding me.. is because you realised you seen me before ma? or because of other reasons? and saw that actually you do have lots of pictures with him.. how envy!! actually i know i have own more things than you have now.. i have him by my side.. i have his heart.. but i just cant stop my mind running and thinking when i see your pictures with him.. i guess it's a natural feeling to be like that.. i think this is what we said jealousy ba! hahaz! dont worry i am okie.. i earnestly hope that you can find your true happiness, someone who will love you with his heart.. jiayou le!:)

cooked maggi mee for dinner.. as usual lohz.. only eat half a share... i think i developed this bad habit to feel like eating BUT then when i see the food, i just dont feel like eating ANYMORE!:( i also dont know why.. will go sleep early tonight.. and wake up early tomorrow!! :) babies, i'm coming......!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!=P

[ 我害怕幸福短暂一秒就崩落....... ]

我害怕幸福短暂一秒就崩落.............


只剩下钢琴陪我站在这里
梦想中属于我们的婚礼
却成了单人结婚进行曲
在这场爱情角力的拔河里
爱我还是爱你
你选择了自己
woo~
撒娇的可爱的黏人的爱哭的
照片里曾经的都是你喜欢的
如今我还在原地
你却走回你的记忆

你说我爱你太多
就快要把你淹没
你害怕幸福短暂一秒就崩落
分开是一种解脱
让你好好的想过
我想要的那片天空
你是不是能够给我

你说我给你太多
却不能给我什么
分不清激情承诺永恒或迷惑
爱情是一道伤口
我们各自苦痛
沉默是我最后温柔
是因为我太爱你 (x2)

heard this song on tv just now.. NICE NICE!! :) share with you guys.. it's 安静了 by S.H.E...

today, woke up at about 11am this morning despite that i actually only at 2plus this morning.. i think yesterday sleep too much liao that's why today cant sleep for long.. woke up and came online.. just happened that he's still not out yet so chatted awhile online.. the web cam really makes me want to pull my hair!! aiyoz! i dont know what's wrong with it.. sianz diao!

took my brunch at 1plus then watch tv and stuff.. wanted to sleep so much but just want to hang on because i want to watch the korean drama that's repeating at channel 8.. "加油！金顺"... i really envy the main actress's spirit.. though she faced so many obstacles but she didnt give up.. i just want to be like her:)

to keep myself awake, i played games while watching tv.. played cooking mama on his DS.. and managed to get 14 golds today!! HAHAZ! i am just too bored lahz! then nobody ask me out also.. i seriously rotting at home lahz! lolx! but actually i got study meeting but i didnt attend.. just too lazy to get out.. lolx! all i think of is my BED! but eyes cant really close today..

mom called at 6plus today.. and ask me to meet her for dinner.. and then not long later, Stella smsed me.. too late liao.. i already promised my mom that i am meeting her.. so sorry worz! but actually, i also pretty long never go meet her after her work for dinner le.. went to meet her at about 7pm.. then she said she want to eat KFC.. kind of surprised that she will say she want to eat fastfood.. wah! really eat till i want to vomit.. so FULL lohz! and mom bought sushi too.. my stomach really go in le.. i am glad enough that i can finish my food today cause today morning, i didnt finish my brunch actually..

appetite has been up and down recently.. i also dont know what's wrong with me.. hais... back home, got online as usual.. waiting for him to come online lohz.. hais.. 等待真的很辛苦，很累人！was telling Stella that if he dont get online by 10pm, i am going to sleep.. hahaz! and i think he heard me in china.. he got online at 9.59pm.. just one minute before i say i want to go sleep... going to finish updating my blog and go sleep..

One of my favorite poets, the Argentine educator Almafuerte (1854-1917) wrote: "To the weak, difficulty is a closed door. To the strong, however, it is a door waiting to be opened." Difficulties impede the progress of those who are weak. For the strong, however, they are an opportunity to open wide the doors to a bright future. Everything is determined by our attitude, by our resolve. Our heart is what matters most.

-Daisaku Ikeda-

[ 等待真的很累人，很漫长.... ]ai

等待真的很累人，很漫长......

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

took this test on this website - http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx.. hahaz! the results quite true actually.. BUT... one thing which i dont agree is about the seriousness of my love.. lolx! since when i flirt and behave seductively? LOLX!!! SUPER NOT AGREE with that.. honey dont do anything bees will also fly there ar... hahaz!

today, i think i really fulfill what Mom always say about me.. 大懒猪 is my nick.. slept about 12plus 1 yesterday and i woke up at almost 2pm this afternoon.. HAHAZ! i dont know why but i am just VERY VERY TIRED!! woke up, eat, pray, shower and then about 5pm plus, i went to sleep again till 8plus then i wake up... lolx.. i am definitely very LAZY today!!

like what i said yesterday, i want to rest well.. hahaz! but headache didnt seems to go away from me despite the so many hours of sleep i had.. Mom and Dad all teasing me.. say because you not around that's why i am sleeping whole day at home.. LOLX!! quite true also lahz.. but then also because i am tired that's why i have decided to sleep at home..

Dad said u seems to lose some weight recently.. and i dont know them sia.. everything also can relate to you.. say i lose weight, no appetite is because you not in singapore.. LOLX.. actually my no appetite thing started way before you go overseas.. am i right? you know it well yup? just had a shower and waiting for you to come online.. hais.. i am feeling sleepy now.. *yawn*

my plans for tomorrow is to stay home and revise a bit for my infant bathing.. cause on tuesday, will have to rush KKH at 6.15am to bathe babies.. hais! need to sacrifice a bit for my skills.. sianz diao.. never mind, one more week to go for my attachment.. jiayou le jessica!! and you also jiayou there huh!! :)

my tooth still aching. i think this is one of the reason why i am losing my appetite? cause chewing food is such a haste to me.. hais!! sobx(T.T) watching "爱就宅一起".. hahaz!so nice lohz the show! :) damn funny! just hope he comes online faster and didi dont come home so soon...

to my STELJESSICALLY sister, STELLA - All the best for your exams yup.. i know you very stressful with your exams.. no worries.. it will end soon.. just do your best! will send prayers to you de!! =] we shall meet up after your exams yup!! GAMBATTE ne!!^-^

Where is happiness to be found? How can we become happy? Happiness is not a question of how you look to others. Rather it is a matter of what you yourself feel inside; it is a deep answering response in your life.

[ independent is the key word..... ]

independent is the key word.....

last day in the paedatric ward today.. was on am shift.. really very very tired but then am happy that i wont have to see all those people after today.. meet Sook Mun today at the interchange and took bus together to work.. she have to rush to bathe infant at 630am..

while walking toward the lift lobby.. saw that woman.. then i purposely go to the 7-eleven to get some milk.. then went to the washroom.. end up, saw her in the washroom! 冤家路在 lohz! sianz diao..

went up to ward.. had my breakfast and start work.. work was okie today.. talked to some older patients.. kind of miss them actually.. hais.. but of course i would hope that this attachment ends faster then i can enjoy my holidays:) will be busy doing some stuff for cca for and for SK.. will meet up with Stella once i have my holidays!!=]

went to HQ today after work to submit the sim card and the receipts for xiao bai.. then after that took 857 home.. slept all the way till i reached my destination.. came home, had a shower and slept till Hui Qian called.. if she didnt call, i would most probably sleep till tomorrow morning.. woke up and got online..

been sneezing quite badly today and coughing a bit also.. tomorrow, will be staying home to rest and sleep!! kekez.. really need a rest badly!! *ah choo* feeling so terrible now! received the letter from ITE today that i received the EAGLES award for CCA!! hahaz! yes.. $150 bucks! hahaz! hope that the nomitation for CCA medal would be successful then i can get the award! just what my efforts to be rewarded..

of cause not only cca and results.. many other things as well.. just hope what i do can be paid off.. hmmm, i am going to sleep liao le:)

[ 我就是离不开你..... ]

我就是离不开你...

Yesterday was on pm shift.. work was quite okie.. except that the weather is a bit too warm that my headache came back again... had a happy time talking and playing with the kids..

Today, on am shift.. really tired when i wake up.. woke up at 4.50pm to wash my hair, shower and pray.. then took bus to KKH.. very tired.. COMA all the way till i reach KKH.. reached KKH and got my breakfast at the 7-eleven..

Yesterday, waited for till about 11pm then call him.. hais.. was really tired, but then i really cherish the time i talked to you.. although everyday is jus less than 10minutes.. BUT..... better than nothing lahz...

was quite happy when i go work today de.. cause i got to bathe baby!! headache also gone!! but then, end up, someone irritated me till my headache came back again.. i dont see that i am doing anything wrong.. if you're not happy, speak up LOUD okie! make sure everyone hears it hor! i'm just carrying a baby that is scared and needs some warmth.. i dont feel that that's being lazy or trying to eat snake..

even my lecturer dont say anything, so... i dont see a reason that you can open your mouth!! anyway. teacher say i am not in the wrong and she knows very clearly why i am doing this.. ANGRY ANGRY ANGRY! hais.. now headache is back.. sneezing and coughing also.. BUT.. Mom was kind today.. she made my 黑鸡汤with当桂.. nice nice!! hope she make it often for me.. and next time for you!:) dont worry, she will accept you de! =]

took bus home today and saw this old couple holding hands on the bus.. so 恩爱!!:) so sweet lohz!!^-^ suddenly, i just thought of you.. you know what i am thinking ma, 虫虫的主人? managed to install the web cam today le!! see you soon online huh!!!:) i feel a bit feverish now.. am i running a fever? i hope NOT! cause i dont want to take MC though i think i really need a good rest BADLY..

managed to get my HR today.. hahaz! gd news! i am starting work on 11th may! means attachment finished liao i will stay have about 2 months holiday.. then one month of my holiday, i'll be spending alone.. BUT i still got one month holiday after you come back.. though you're going to start school but i am not starting work yet.. then it will be my turn to go meet you! hahaz! 18th april, please come FASTER lahz! =] going to eat my dinner!! *yum yum*

[ 想见不能见最痛! ]

想见不能见最痛!

Today is the 2nd day you are not around. Friends say i seems to be very sticky with you.. Actually, the true fact is that you're more sticky to me than me to you. But then, when you go overseas, it seems like i am more sticky liao..

work is okie today.. came to work and baby cried.. and i carried her for about 1 hour plus!! till my hand also aching.. i was thinking, if i give birth next time and my baby starts to cry non-stop in the middle of the night.. i think i can die!! lolx, but at the end of the day, this baby also made my day!! she brought so much laughter to me till i seems to have forgotten you're not around with me..

Dont have to feel any sense of guilt cause my headache is not caused by you directly.. you should know i always have this problem of having headache and miagraine.. cant be helped.. didnt take care of myself especially after my operation.. didnt take 补品 after operation also.. so body weak.. hais.. i just hope attachment can finish faster and i can rest.. BUT, thinking about holidays, i think i'll be very bored.. and will think of you MORE!!

it's really hard to communicate when you're there and i am here.. cant talk too long, cant this cant that.. hais.. like what you said, you're away 2days only and i'm already sick for 2days.. and now, the situation is you're going to be away for 7weeks, am i going to be sick for 7 weeks? i think no lahz.. and hope not.. 7weeks like that i can die!!

hmmm, today, i am going to be a good girl... will sleep early today and wake up early for breakfast tomorrow.. will make sure my stomach is full before i go work.. Then u wont worry about me yup! :) please take care of yourself over there.. you will worry about me, i will worry about you too!! ^-^ got to go.. going to lala land!=]

[ 思念 ]

思念

Today is the first day you are away.. 真得很不舍得，可是我又能怎样呢？Really hope that i can fly over to take care of you while you're there having your attachment.. Hahaz! BUT.... comes to think about it, if i go, you will probably be more troubled! Cause instead of me taking care of you, I think it would be you taking care of me..

I guess you can be better off over there ba.. Dont need to fetch me from work and send me home.. Dont need to talk with me till wee hours. Dont need to stay up late to study after talking to me.. Dont need to see my sickly face. Dont need to be bother by me.

BUT... i know you would rather do these than going there at this period.. Like what you said, 7 weeks will pass very fast de!!! I also thought it would be this way, but since yesterday, for dont know what reason, i felt that i am really EMO! when i think about you going there, my tears will just flow!! Just like now while i am typing this entry.. The WORST thing is - i CANT cry out loud, i CANT cry for long. Cause Mom's around at home.. Hais.. This is the WORST feeling i ever had. To withhold my tears..

Really WORRIED about about how you are over there. But after hearing what you said just now, seems like everything seems okie over at your side. After all, it's almost like your hometown.. You should be able to adapt fast since you're always alone in Singapore studying. Hais. I cant even concentrate on my work today! Looking at my hp every now and then, hoping to receive your call or even just a simple sms. And when i managed to get through you, you are either still busy or that you cant talk for long because of the costly bill..

Hais.. It really seems like HELL to me when it's just the FIRST day! Thank god my friend is with me when i go to work or return home, if not, i'll probably think even more and cry even more.. Never thought that the "Jessica" you know will be this EMO? hais. ya, i myself also never thought that i'll be like that. Cause it's WORSE than NS manz.. Plus, i'm really not well today.. Though the kids who usually will make my day cant even brighten my smile.. Hais! Like i said, i'm WEAK and really WEAK when it talks about BGR..

i dont know how the 6weeks and 6days going to be like.. BUT.... i know i cant be like that for the rest of the days.. 放心吧！我会好好照顾自己！别担心！我还有爸妈在我身边。你自己要珍重！i know you gonna scold me if you see this entry. Cause i am not well, yet i am sitting in front of the computer typing this entry. BUT, i really cant help. I need to write, need to let out. If not, i will keep crying. I just hate the feeling of falling sick and missing you so badly now... And i dont wish to cry till i fall asleep. Cause i know i will have a even more terrible headache the next day i wake up..

Work was quite okie today.. Except that learning opportunities has been shared due to the available of NYP students in our ward.. Hmmm, i just dont like it.. First day at KKH, still need some time to adapt.. Hopes everything turn out better tomorrow..

好吧, enough liao. I am going to sleep. Tomorrow, will be on afternoon shift. Hopes my EMO-ing and headache goes away tomorrow.. Will be sending prayers to you too! *Loves*

[ 我们就要相隔两地了！]

我们就要相隔两地了！

I just feel like blogging suddenly....

In a few hours time, we are going to be separated by different continent.. this separation will be 7weeks!! OMG!! thinking about this, my tears just cant stop flowing down..

This few days was a great get-together.. although the times together was not really that long, but i cherish every single moment we are together.. even just 5minutes is a lot to me..

went to watch "Marley and me" yesterday.. and suddenly, i feel unwell.. saw how you are worried about me.. i'm sorry, didnt meant to make you worried actually.. i'm sorry..

today, i had a happy time too!! but time is so short.. especially when we say good bye at Yishun today.. my heart like cracking liao!! sobx sobx.. e walk back is so HORRIBLE! seems so long when it's just a short walk.. sobx sobx.. i dont know what to say actually..

but seriously.. i really will miss you a lot a lot de.. hope everything gonna be okie for you over there.. remember to call me ar!! sobx! will send my prayers to you:) *loves*